Twas the Night (2002)

[00:00:03] [SPEAKER_01]: This is a Bramble Jam Podcast.

[00:00:15] [SPEAKER_03]: Bop, bop, bop, bop, bop. Hello!

[00:00:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Hello everybody.

[00:00:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Happy to be here.

[00:00:21] [SPEAKER_01]: To another episode of DCOM Descendants.

[00:00:24] [SPEAKER_00]: DCOM Descendants.

[00:00:25] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm Brann.

[00:00:26] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm Erin.

[00:00:27] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm Dan.

[00:00:28] [SPEAKER_01]: It's great to be here today.

[00:00:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Merry Christmas to everybody.

[00:00:31] [SPEAKER_01]: And happy fall.

[00:00:31] [SPEAKER_02]: Merry Christmas. Happy fall?

[00:00:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Happy Easter.

[00:00:36] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know.

[00:00:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Happy summer Celsius.

[00:00:38] [SPEAKER_02]: Whatever you're celebrating today.

[00:00:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Happy Arbor Day.

[00:00:40] [SPEAKER_01]: Happy to you.

[00:00:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Flag Day.

[00:00:42] [SPEAKER_02]: It's flag day.

[00:00:43] [SPEAKER_02]: We can do it all.

[00:00:44] [SPEAKER_02]: You know, here's the thing.

[00:00:45] [SPEAKER_02]: What I've learned is that it doesn't have to be the season or the holiday for you to celebrate.

[00:00:48] [SPEAKER_02]: If it's that in your heart, then that's all that matters.

[00:00:51] [SPEAKER_02]: Yes.

[00:00:51] [SPEAKER_02]: I love it.

[00:00:52] [SPEAKER_02]: That's great.

[00:00:53] [SPEAKER_02]: Do you?

[00:00:54] [SPEAKER_02]: It's my birthday today.

[00:00:54] [SPEAKER_01]: You make fun of me a lot about the way that it is.

[00:00:56] [SPEAKER_01]: Hey, we don't jump on birthdays.

[00:00:57] [SPEAKER_02]: That's right.

[00:00:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, I'm just saying.

[00:01:00] [SPEAKER_02]: That's how we're doing things around here.

[00:01:02] [SPEAKER_02]: If we feel it, that's it.

[00:01:03] [SPEAKER_02]: It's good to go.

[00:01:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Great.

[00:01:05] [SPEAKER_02]: Yes.

[00:01:06] [SPEAKER_02]: It's flag day in my heart.

[00:01:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Good.

[00:01:08] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm glad.

[00:01:09] [SPEAKER_01]: It's flag day.

[00:01:11] [SPEAKER_01]: It's great to be here.

[00:01:11] [SPEAKER_00]: When is it going to be Dingo's Day again?

[00:01:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, you can't fake that one.

[00:01:15] [SPEAKER_01]: I think that's post Easter or pre Easter?

[00:01:17] [SPEAKER_00]: It's the Monday after Easter.

[00:01:18] [SPEAKER_01]: It's the Monday after Easter.

[00:01:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Read a book.

[00:01:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Sorry.

[00:01:22] [SPEAKER_02]: I always made a joke that I realized this wasn't the Decker Hallmark.

[00:01:24] [SPEAKER_02]: And the joke would have been very weird to those that aren't initiated to

[00:01:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Decker Hallmark.

[00:01:29] [SPEAKER_02]: So I didn't make it.

[00:01:30] [SPEAKER_01]: And there's some of those people, Dan, and you're going to look up if we have any

[00:01:32] [SPEAKER_01]: new reviews.

[00:01:33] [SPEAKER_01]: We have them.

[00:01:34] [SPEAKER_01]: I've got them.

[00:01:34] [SPEAKER_01]: Great.

[00:01:35] [SPEAKER_01]: Great.

[00:01:35] [SPEAKER_02]: Well, you do that.

[00:01:36] [SPEAKER_02]: What do we got?

[00:01:36] [SPEAKER_02]: We've got some good ones.

[00:01:38] [SPEAKER_02]: We got up to 121.

[00:01:40] [SPEAKER_02]: We've got 300 for us to cover the other movies, which we're not going to do

[00:01:44] [SPEAKER_02]: because the math says we're not.

[00:01:46] [SPEAKER_00]: The math does say we are.

[00:01:47] [SPEAKER_02]: I believe it in my heart.

[00:01:48] [SPEAKER_02]: You believe it in your heart.

[00:01:49] [SPEAKER_02]: That makes it true.

[00:01:50] [SPEAKER_02]: What math?

[00:01:51] [SPEAKER_02]: What are you talking about?

[00:01:52] [SPEAKER_01]: The math.

[00:01:52] [SPEAKER_02]: The number of reviews we're getting per week says we're not going to get

[00:01:56] [SPEAKER_02]: to 300 before we need to do it.

[00:01:58] [SPEAKER_02]: So you don't believe this show is going to ever blow up?

[00:02:00] [SPEAKER_02]: I think we're doing great.

[00:02:02] [SPEAKER_02]: But you don't believe we're going to blow up?

[00:02:03] [SPEAKER_02]: I think to blow up to the level of that, it would require some doing.

[00:02:08] [SPEAKER_02]: So everybody's going to need to really share with their friends is what I'm

[00:02:10] [SPEAKER_02]: saying.

[00:02:10] [SPEAKER_02]: That's all we're saying.

[00:02:11] [SPEAKER_02]: You read the hand friend seven review.

[00:02:13] [SPEAKER_02]: I've got two more.

[00:02:14] [SPEAKER_02]: I've got Cathy cat 91, who says love reliving my favorite Disney

[00:02:18] [SPEAKER_02]: channel original movies.

[00:02:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Great work you guys.

[00:02:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you Cathy cat 91.

[00:02:24] [SPEAKER_02]: Love it.

[00:02:25] [SPEAKER_02]: And then we got mama Magda 28.

[00:02:27] [SPEAKER_00]: We love her too.

[00:02:28] [SPEAKER_02]: The other 27 mama Magda's out there second place.

[00:02:32] [SPEAKER_02]: Mama Magda 28 says number one in our hearts have only watched a

[00:02:36] [SPEAKER_02]: couple of D comms, but I listen every week.

[00:02:39] [SPEAKER_02]: So no, Dan, we have to keep this going.

[00:02:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Sorry, everybody.

[00:02:42] [SPEAKER_02]: I got 28 and then he sneezed in the middle of your.

[00:02:45] [SPEAKER_01]: I was on my way to muting my mic and it came out.

[00:02:48] [SPEAKER_01]: Man, well, he's off camera.

[00:02:50] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm off camera.

[00:02:50] [SPEAKER_02]: So we got another five star that with no review.

[00:02:53] [SPEAKER_02]: So you guys are doing it.

[00:02:54] [SPEAKER_02]: I just leave it.

[00:02:55] [SPEAKER_02]: Bless you were late.

[00:02:56] [SPEAKER_02]: This is fine.

[00:02:56] [SPEAKER_02]: We'll see all through it.

[00:02:57] [SPEAKER_02]: We'll see.

[00:02:57] [SPEAKER_02]: I'll throw it.

[00:02:58] [SPEAKER_02]: That way won't be weird.

[00:02:58] [SPEAKER_02]: We'll sneeze every few.

[00:03:00] [SPEAKER_02]: It won't be weird.

[00:03:01] [SPEAKER_02]: Then it won't be worth doing it.

[00:03:03] [SPEAKER_02]: Then people get used to it.

[00:03:05] [SPEAKER_02]: That's right.

[00:03:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Sorry, I didn't clear my throat there.

[00:03:12] [SPEAKER_02]: That would be normal.

[00:03:13] [SPEAKER_02]: It would be a normal part of the show.

[00:03:14] [SPEAKER_00]: I do think our episodes when we've been away from each other

[00:03:17] [SPEAKER_00]: for a few days just go off the rails.

[00:03:20] [SPEAKER_01]: So I don't think this is going to go.

[00:03:22] [SPEAKER_01]: What's weird about this?

[00:03:24] [SPEAKER_01]: What's weird about this?

[00:03:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Brian Hansen is saying his favorite.

[00:03:27] [SPEAKER_00]: And he had taken it to the table.

[00:03:29] [SPEAKER_00]: It would have it's already off the rails.

[00:03:32] [SPEAKER_00]: That's right.

[00:03:33] [SPEAKER_02]: You can watch us watch these movies live.

[00:03:35] [SPEAKER_02]: You sure can?

[00:03:35] [SPEAKER_02]: Tramplejamplus.com.

[00:03:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, you sure can.

[00:03:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Takethetape.com and buy the audio track if you want.

[00:03:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Right.

[00:03:40] [SPEAKER_00]: You get the video?

[00:03:42] [SPEAKER_02]: We're giving it away.

[00:03:43] [SPEAKER_02]: We sure are.

[00:03:44] [SPEAKER_00]: But yeah, if you've never purchased a take it

[00:03:47] [SPEAKER_00]: to the tape from us, maybe get this one.

[00:03:49] [SPEAKER_00]: It was a good time.

[00:03:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:03:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Takethetape.com.

[00:03:51] [SPEAKER_01]: That's all you got to do.

[00:03:52] [SPEAKER_02]: I mean, I don't know if you really

[00:03:53] [SPEAKER_02]: need the movie on in the background.

[00:03:54] [SPEAKER_02]: You probably just play your cards.

[00:03:56] [SPEAKER_01]: It's its own thing, really.

[00:03:58] [SPEAKER_01]: It's its own thing.

[00:03:59] [SPEAKER_00]: It's barely a commentary.

[00:04:01] Barely.

[00:04:01] [SPEAKER_00]: But if you want to watch us just.

[00:04:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Or just hang out with us for an hour and a half.

[00:04:06] [SPEAKER_01]: You can just hang out.

[00:04:07] [SPEAKER_00]: That's what it is.

[00:04:08] [SPEAKER_01]: That's what it is.

[00:04:12] [SPEAKER_01]: So what more you need.

[00:04:15] [SPEAKER_01]: That's what it is.

[00:04:16] [SPEAKER_01]: What it is.

[00:04:17] [SPEAKER_01]: You know what it is right now?

[00:04:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Delish.

[00:04:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it is.

[00:04:22] Decom.

[00:04:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Decorate.

[00:04:24] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm excited about this.

[00:04:25] [SPEAKER_01]: There's lots of festive foods and whatnot

[00:04:29] [SPEAKER_01]: that you could have brought to the table

[00:04:30] [SPEAKER_01]: for Twas the Nights.

[00:04:33] [SPEAKER_01]: Maybe a roast turkey.

[00:04:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Something roast turkey.

[00:04:38] [SPEAKER_01]: A cookie in the shape of a violin.

[00:04:42] [SPEAKER_01]: A piano.

[00:04:44] [SPEAKER_01]: A brownie.

[00:04:45] [SPEAKER_01]: A brownie.

[00:04:46] [SPEAKER_01]: It's like a brownie.

[00:04:46] [SPEAKER_01]: It's a piano, but then you got the keys down.

[00:04:48] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't know.

[00:04:49] [SPEAKER_01]: These are all ideas because he steals a piano.

[00:04:52] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I wasn't home all weekend to be working on these.

[00:04:54] [SPEAKER_02]: And she barely was here.

[00:04:57] [SPEAKER_00]: Could you imagine me trying to decorate cookies

[00:05:00] [SPEAKER_00]: in your house?

[00:05:02] [SPEAKER_02]: I mean, yeah, I could imagine you trying to do that.

[00:05:05] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, but the dogs would have...

[00:05:06] [SPEAKER_02]: Could you even imagine it?

[00:05:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Graham would not let me.

[00:05:09] [SPEAKER_02]: Can't even imagine it.

[00:05:09] [SPEAKER_02]: He would.

[00:05:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Hey.

[00:05:11] [SPEAKER_02]: He'd be up on the counter.

[00:05:12] [SPEAKER_02]: You got to get him off the counter.

[00:05:14] [SPEAKER_02]: If he puts his paws on the counter,

[00:05:15] [SPEAKER_02]: you're going to knock him off the counter.

[00:05:16] [SPEAKER_00]: I did.

[00:05:17] [SPEAKER_02]: OK, good.

[00:05:18] [SPEAKER_00]: What do we got today, Erin?

[00:05:20] [SPEAKER_01]: What do we got today?

[00:05:22] [SPEAKER_00]: Today we have a festive Christmas mimosa.

[00:05:26] [SPEAKER_00]: So it is a little bit of champagne

[00:05:28] [SPEAKER_00]: with some cranberry juice instead of orange juice

[00:05:31] [SPEAKER_00]: and a sprig of rosemary.

[00:05:32] [SPEAKER_02]: Sprig of rosemary.

[00:05:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you get this rosemary?

[00:05:35] [SPEAKER_02]: I just noticed that Apple Podcast has this listed

[00:05:37] [SPEAKER_02]: as a clean podcast.

[00:05:38] [SPEAKER_02]: Is that... Do we rank that?

[00:05:39] [SPEAKER_02]: It's clean.

[00:05:40] [SPEAKER_02]: OK.

[00:05:40] [SPEAKER_02]: We have not had an explicit podcast.

[00:05:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Wow, great.

[00:05:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Is explicit mean you have to say like the F word?

[00:05:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:05:46] [SPEAKER_01]: OK, got it.

[00:05:47] [SPEAKER_01]: And you have to flag it yourself.

[00:05:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, OK.

[00:05:49] [SPEAKER_01]: That's why.

[00:05:51] [SPEAKER_00]: Dan has a secret herb garden at his house.

[00:05:53] [SPEAKER_00]: Oh.

[00:05:53] [SPEAKER_00]: I picked this fresh.

[00:05:55] [SPEAKER_00]: He doesn't want people to know about it,

[00:05:56] [SPEAKER_00]: but I found it.

[00:05:57] [SPEAKER_01]: So is this going to taste festive

[00:05:59] [SPEAKER_01]: or is it just going to look festive?

[00:06:00] [SPEAKER_02]: It's got a sprig of rosemary and cranberry juice in it.

[00:06:03] [SPEAKER_02]: You mother father.

[00:06:06] [SPEAKER_02]: You father Christmas.

[00:06:09] [SPEAKER_01]: All right, let's try it.

[00:06:10] [SPEAKER_01]: Cheers, everybody.

[00:06:17] [SPEAKER_01]: That's not bad.

[00:06:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:06:19] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm not mad at it.

[00:06:21] [SPEAKER_01]: I like looking at it, how the bubbles just kind of...

[00:06:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Where do they come from?

[00:06:24] [SPEAKER_01]: Where are those bubbles coming from?

[00:06:25] [SPEAKER_00]: Where do they come from and where do they go?

[00:06:27] [SPEAKER_00]: Where do you come from?

[00:06:29] [SPEAKER_03]: Connajo.

[00:06:34] [SPEAKER_03]: Where did it come from?

[00:06:36] [SPEAKER_03]: Where did it go?

[00:06:37] [SPEAKER_03]: Where did it come from?

[00:06:38] [SPEAKER_02]: Connajo.

[00:06:38] [SPEAKER_02]: Is that song canceled?

[00:06:40] [SPEAKER_02]: That's not canceled?

[00:06:41] [SPEAKER_02]: It isn't canceled.

[00:06:42] [SPEAKER_02]: OK.

[00:06:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Did you know that my kids got into that song

[00:06:46] [SPEAKER_02]: a few months ago and literally did not

[00:06:49] [SPEAKER_02]: know that they just said it hadn't been for Connajo

[00:06:51] [SPEAKER_02]: over and over again?

[00:06:53] [SPEAKER_02]: I thought they mixed that up.

[00:06:55] [SPEAKER_02]: Like, I thought there was a different line there

[00:06:56] [SPEAKER_02]: every time.

[00:06:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Like at one point, I thought they said,

[00:06:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Dan, you're a good singer.

[00:06:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Down at the beach with Connajo.

[00:07:01] [SPEAKER_02]: Then at the beach, Connajo.

[00:07:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Wait, so wait, what is it?

[00:07:05] [SPEAKER_02]: It's the same line over and over again.

[00:07:07] [SPEAKER_02]: If it hadn't been for Connajo, I'd been married a long time ago.

[00:07:12] [SPEAKER_02]: Connajo comes into town and steals all the ladies.

[00:07:15] [SPEAKER_02]: That's what happens in that song.

[00:07:17] [SPEAKER_00]: Where did they come from and where do they go?

[00:07:18] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you come from?

[00:07:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you go?

[00:07:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you come from, Connajo?

[00:07:22] [SPEAKER_02]: And then once the ladies have danced with Connajo,

[00:07:25] [SPEAKER_02]: it's like, I can't settle for some mortal man anymore.

[00:07:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Well, that's Connajo.

[00:07:28] [SPEAKER_02]: I'd dance with Connajo.

[00:07:30] [SPEAKER_02]: In my version, they're hanging out at the beach.

[00:07:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Then at the beach, Connajo.

[00:07:35] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know why I thought it was that.

[00:07:37] [SPEAKER_02]: It's down at the, listen, it's the summer version.

[00:07:39] [SPEAKER_02]: They're mad at this guy.

[00:07:40] [SPEAKER_02]: They're mad at Connajo.

[00:07:41] [SPEAKER_02]: If it hadn't been for Connajo,

[00:07:44] [SPEAKER_02]: I'd been married a long time ago.

[00:07:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you come from?

[00:07:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you go?

[00:07:48] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you come from, Connajo?

[00:07:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Are there verses?

[00:07:52] [SPEAKER_02]: No, that's it.

[00:07:52] [SPEAKER_02]: That's the whole song.

[00:07:53] [SPEAKER_00]: For six minutes.

[00:07:55] [SPEAKER_02]: Hey, hey, hey!

[00:07:55] [SPEAKER_02]: I think at one point they go,

[00:07:56] [SPEAKER_02]: now what do you say?

[00:07:57] [SPEAKER_02]: Y'all say what?

[00:07:59] [SPEAKER_02]: I think they do that.

[00:08:00] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.

[00:08:00] [SPEAKER_02]: But I could be wrong.

[00:08:02] [SPEAKER_02]: It might be a remix.

[00:08:03] [SPEAKER_00]: In my elementary school gym class,

[00:08:05] [SPEAKER_00]: we had a dance unit.

[00:08:06] [SPEAKER_00]: You were going to the dance.

[00:08:06] [SPEAKER_00]: I think you told the story.

[00:08:07] [SPEAKER_00]: And we had to learn the dance.

[00:08:08] [SPEAKER_00]: And I still know it.

[00:08:09] [SPEAKER_00]: And if I'm ever out at a bar at two in the morning

[00:08:12] [SPEAKER_00]: and this comes on, I will do it.

[00:08:13] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.

[00:08:14] [SPEAKER_02]: And we have that video.

[00:08:15] [SPEAKER_02]: If you follow the decumbed sentence.

[00:08:17] [SPEAKER_01]: That would explain this morning

[00:08:19] [SPEAKER_01]: if you were out late doing the Cotton Eye Joe.

[00:08:21] [SPEAKER_02]: That's right.

[00:08:21] [SPEAKER_02]: That's right.

[00:08:22] [SPEAKER_02]: You did call to say you had overslept,

[00:08:23] [SPEAKER_02]: but there was like club music in the background.

[00:08:26] [SPEAKER_02]: I was still at the club at night.

[00:08:29] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you come from?

[00:08:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you come from?

[00:08:31] [SPEAKER_02]: It was a remix.

[00:08:32] [SPEAKER_00]: Guys, keep it down.

[00:08:33] [SPEAKER_02]: I have to call work.

[00:08:33] [SPEAKER_02]: That's right.

[00:08:34] [SPEAKER_02]: It's a club that plays Cotton Eye Joe remixes

[00:08:37] [SPEAKER_02]: on a loop.

[00:08:37] [SPEAKER_00]: All night.

[00:08:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Sounds awful.

[00:08:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:08:41] [SPEAKER_01]: Where'd you come from?

[00:08:41] [SPEAKER_01]: Where'd you go?

[00:08:42] [SPEAKER_01]: That's what we're trying to say.

[00:08:43] [SPEAKER_01]: So the drink is what we're trying to say.

[00:08:45] [SPEAKER_01]: We're going to take a quick break.

[00:08:47] [SPEAKER_01]: We're going to come back.

[00:08:48] [SPEAKER_01]: We're going to talk t'was the night.

[00:08:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Here on Decon Descendants.

[00:08:57] [SPEAKER_01]: It hadn't been for him.

[00:09:00] [SPEAKER_02]: Man, I was almost married that one time.

[00:09:03] [SPEAKER_02]: F'ing Cotton Eye Joe came to town.

[00:09:06] [SPEAKER_02]: Never stood a chance.

[00:09:07] [SPEAKER_00]: Father Christmas Cotton Eye Joe.

[00:09:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Whoa, come back everybody.

[00:09:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Mother Father Christmas.

[00:09:12] [SPEAKER_01]: Mother Father Christmas.

[00:09:13] [SPEAKER_01]: We are back and we're talking t'was the night.

[00:09:17] [SPEAKER_01]: T'was the night is what we're talking about today.

[00:09:21] [SPEAKER_01]: A movie that I discovered last year.

[00:09:24] [SPEAKER_05]: I discovered today.

[00:09:24] [SPEAKER_01]: You discovered today.

[00:09:25] [SPEAKER_01]: We're all discovering things at varying times

[00:09:29] [SPEAKER_01]: in varying places even.

[00:09:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Just two.

[00:09:32] [SPEAKER_00]: But like 20 years too late.

[00:09:35] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know where this movie was in my childhood.

[00:09:37] [SPEAKER_01]: December 7th, 2001 is when this movie premiered

[00:09:41] [SPEAKER_01]: on the old.

[00:09:42] [SPEAKER_00]: Right at Christmas time.

[00:09:44] [SPEAKER_00]: What was I doing?

[00:09:46] [SPEAKER_01]: It's directed by Michael Myers himself.

[00:09:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Nick Castle.

[00:09:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Nick Castle, the guy who plays Mike Myers

[00:09:53] [SPEAKER_01]: in the Halloween movies.

[00:09:54] [SPEAKER_01]: He directed this movie.

[00:09:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.

[00:09:56] [SPEAKER_01]: For what that's worth.

[00:09:57] [SPEAKER_01]: There you go.

[00:09:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Starring for some reason on Wikipedia,

[00:10:00] [SPEAKER_01]: third billing, Brian Cranston.

[00:10:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Third, you guys see on the call sheet.

[00:10:04] [SPEAKER_01]: And then Josh Duckerman, Brenda Gate

[00:10:07] [SPEAKER_01]: and then of course Jefferson Mappin.

[00:10:10] [SPEAKER_01]: Jeff Mappin.

[00:10:11] [SPEAKER_01]: He be Mappin.

[00:10:12] [SPEAKER_01]: What's Jeff doing?

[00:10:13] [SPEAKER_00]: His name is Jefferson Mappin.

[00:10:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Jefferson Mappin.

[00:10:15] [SPEAKER_02]: Is it Jeffrey?

[00:10:16] [SPEAKER_02]: I'll call him whatever I damn well please.

[00:10:17] [SPEAKER_02]: He is not a good Santa.

[00:10:20] [SPEAKER_01]: You heard me.

[00:10:21] [SPEAKER_00]: Jefferson be.

[00:10:21] [SPEAKER_00]: You leave him in a starship out of this.

[00:10:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Listen, Jefferson be Mappin.

[00:10:25] [SPEAKER_01]: But Aaron be Nappin.

[00:10:26] [SPEAKER_01]: You know what I mean?

[00:10:28] [SPEAKER_01]: Very fun.

[00:10:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Aaron was like, that's all we're trying to say.

[00:10:30] [SPEAKER_02]: I hate the fact that you were late for work

[00:10:32] [SPEAKER_02]: because you overslept.

[00:10:33] [SPEAKER_02]: Because you now never get to hear the end of it.

[00:10:37] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm the only one who's ever been late to the office.

[00:10:39] [SPEAKER_02]: It's fine.

[00:10:39] [SPEAKER_02]: That's true.

[00:10:41] [SPEAKER_02]: From oversleeping probably.

[00:10:43] [SPEAKER_00]: That's true.

[00:10:44] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't have children.

[00:10:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Should have said you were saving puppies or something.

[00:10:46] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't have.

[00:10:47] [SPEAKER_00]: I saved a lot of puppies this weekend.

[00:10:48] [SPEAKER_02]: That's right.

[00:10:49] [SPEAKER_02]: You did.

[00:10:49] [SPEAKER_02]: I'd love to oversleep.

[00:10:50] [SPEAKER_00]: I kept seven puppies in one cat alive.

[00:10:52] [SPEAKER_00]: You did.

[00:10:52] [SPEAKER_00]: All weekend.

[00:10:53] [SPEAKER_02]: Doing the Lord's work.

[00:10:54] [SPEAKER_00]: With these two hands.

[00:10:55] [SPEAKER_00]: That's right.

[00:10:57] [SPEAKER_02]: What a hero.

[00:11:01] [SPEAKER_01]: 59, 58, 57.

[00:11:04] [SPEAKER_01]: The movie kicks off with.

[00:11:06] [SPEAKER_00]: Beautiful puppy, that's a pretty puppy.

[00:11:08] [SPEAKER_00]: That is how I pay her.

[00:11:09] [SPEAKER_03]: Hand out a bit for God Nigel.

[00:11:11] [SPEAKER_03]: I've been married a long time ago.

[00:11:13] [SPEAKER_03]: Where did you come from?

[00:11:13] [SPEAKER_03]: Where did you go?

[00:11:14] [SPEAKER_03]: Where did you come from, God Nigel?

[00:11:16] [SPEAKER_03]: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

[00:11:17] [SPEAKER_03]: Now what do you say?

[00:11:18] [SPEAKER_03]: Hey, hey, hey, hey.

[00:11:18] [SPEAKER_03]: You all say what?

[00:11:20] [SPEAKER_03]: Hey, hey, hey, hey.

[00:11:20] [SPEAKER_03]: Little bit louder.

[00:11:21] [SPEAKER_03]: Hey, hey.

[00:11:23] [SPEAKER_03]: That's a bit for God Nigel.

[00:11:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Here's the thing, I would have.

[00:11:27] [SPEAKER_01]: I had a plan for my life.

[00:11:30] [SPEAKER_01]: I had the vision board.

[00:11:31] [SPEAKER_02]: I had it all mapped out.

[00:11:33] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm gonna be married.

[00:11:35] [SPEAKER_02]: And now girls down at the beach with God Nigel.

[00:11:39] [SPEAKER_02]: If it wasn't for him.

[00:11:41] [SPEAKER_02]: He just keeps going from town to town.

[00:11:43] [SPEAKER_02]: This guy.

[00:11:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Getting all the ladies.

[00:11:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, straw hat on.

[00:11:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Once the.

[00:11:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Ma'am, I'm God Nigel.

[00:11:49] [SPEAKER_02]: Say no more.

[00:11:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Once the ladies see him.

[00:11:52] [SPEAKER_00]: There are like two verses that are different.

[00:11:55] [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.

[00:11:56] [SPEAKER_00]: Oh really?

[00:11:56] [SPEAKER_04]: Give it to me please.

[00:11:58] [SPEAKER_04]: What are they?

[00:12:00] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, these are the bridges.

[00:12:01] [SPEAKER_02]: This is that thing the woman sings

[00:12:02] [SPEAKER_02]: like pissing the night away and trouble.

[00:12:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh yeah, it's like.

[00:12:05] [SPEAKER_02]: A woman comes in.

[00:12:06] [SPEAKER_02]: It goes like.

[00:12:07] [SPEAKER_04]: We know, we know, we know.

[00:12:09] [SPEAKER_03]: That's what I do.

[00:12:10] [SPEAKER_03]: What are the words?

[00:12:11] [SPEAKER_03]: Cause she's the one who was taken by.

[00:12:14] [SPEAKER_02]: He came to town like a mid winter storm.

[00:12:16] [SPEAKER_02]: He rode through the field so handsome and strong.

[00:12:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Cause that rhymes with storm.

[00:12:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Not on your live God Nigel.

[00:12:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Come on Rednecks.

[00:12:23] [SPEAKER_02]: Be better.

[00:12:24] [SPEAKER_02]: Rednecks with an X who wrote this song.

[00:12:26] [SPEAKER_02]: Doesn't she do that?

[00:12:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, she does.

[00:12:29] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, sure.

[00:12:30] [SPEAKER_02]: His eyes was his tools and his smile was his gun.

[00:12:35] [SPEAKER_02]: But all he had come for was having some fun.

[00:12:38] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm telling you.

[00:12:40] [SPEAKER_02]: This no good low life shows up.

[00:12:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Promises all the ladies.

[00:12:43] [SPEAKER_02]: How can we compete?

[00:12:46] [SPEAKER_01]: We're just a couple of God fearing men

[00:12:49] [SPEAKER_01]: and we can't compete with.

[00:12:51] [SPEAKER_02]: We're playing by the rules.

[00:12:52] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, he brought disaster wherever he went.

[00:12:55] [SPEAKER_02]: The hearts of the girls was to hell, broke and sent.

[00:12:58] [SPEAKER_02]: They all ran away so nobody would know

[00:13:01] [SPEAKER_02]: and left only men cause of cotton eyed Joe.

[00:13:05] [SPEAKER_02]: That's better than mid winter storm

[00:13:08] [SPEAKER_02]: and handsome and strong.

[00:13:10] [SPEAKER_02]: The cotton eyed Joe killed the women?

[00:13:11] [SPEAKER_00]: No, he took them with him.

[00:13:13] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, straight to hell.

[00:13:16] [SPEAKER_02]: The hearts of the girls went to hell, broken and sent.

[00:13:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Cotton eyed Joe has a cult that is just women somewhere.

[00:13:22] [SPEAKER_02]: But I wanna be clear, those two bridges do exist

[00:13:25] [SPEAKER_02]: but there are one, two, three, four,

[00:13:29] [SPEAKER_02]: five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11 refrains

[00:13:35] [SPEAKER_02]: of if it hadn't been for cotton eyed Joe,

[00:13:37] [SPEAKER_02]: I'd been married a long time ago.

[00:13:38] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you come from?

[00:13:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you go?

[00:13:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did you come from cotton eyed Joe?

[00:13:41] [SPEAKER_00]: So one verse for every time Nikki Duloch

[00:13:43] [SPEAKER_00]: says Merry Christmas and reunited at Christmas.

[00:13:45] [SPEAKER_02]: That's true.

[00:13:46] Man.

[00:13:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Man.

[00:13:47] [SPEAKER_00]: It's all connected.

[00:13:49] [SPEAKER_02]: And not one down at the beach.

[00:13:50] [SPEAKER_00]: At some point they would go to the beach.

[00:13:54] [SPEAKER_02]: They all ran away.

[00:13:57] [SPEAKER_02]: We're never gonna finish.

[00:13:58] [SPEAKER_01]: All right, the movie kicks off with

[00:14:00] [SPEAKER_01]: a narration. We have a big episode to go to.

[00:14:02] [SPEAKER_01]: There's narration and it's telling us

[00:14:04] [SPEAKER_01]: that it's the night before Christmas Eve.

[00:14:06] [SPEAKER_01]: It's the night before Christmas.

[00:14:06] [SPEAKER_00]: Is it just normal narration or is it in rhyme?

[00:14:08] [SPEAKER_01]: It is in rhyme.

[00:14:10] [SPEAKER_01]: It starts like you're thinking,

[00:14:12] [SPEAKER_01]: oh this was the night before Christmas, got it.

[00:14:13] [SPEAKER_01]: No big deal.

[00:14:14] [SPEAKER_01]: But then we see Santa.

[00:14:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Santa has been tied to a chair with Christmas lights

[00:14:19] [SPEAKER_01]: and our narrator.

[00:14:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Was he tied with tinsel?

[00:14:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, probably, no.

[00:14:24] [SPEAKER_01]: Christmas lights.

[00:14:25] [SPEAKER_01]: The tinsel you can cut right through.

[00:14:28] [SPEAKER_01]: And so we don't know why that is the case.

[00:14:31] [SPEAKER_01]: The narrator promises us that we are gonna

[00:14:34] [SPEAKER_01]: get to that point.

[00:14:35] [SPEAKER_02]: And we don't ever.

[00:14:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Well we get to it but he's not there.

[00:14:38] [SPEAKER_01]: The narrator's not there.

[00:14:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Maybe it's an omniscient narrator.

[00:14:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Maybe.

[00:14:43] [SPEAKER_02]: No, the narrator's Danny.

[00:14:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah but maybe he's omniscient as narrator.

[00:14:49] [SPEAKER_02]: Dang.

[00:14:49] [SPEAKER_02]: See what I did there?

[00:14:51] [SPEAKER_02]: Maybe he's Cotteney Joe.

[00:14:53] [SPEAKER_02]: Maybe he's Cotteney Joe.

[00:14:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Where'd he come from?

[00:14:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Where did he go is a better question if you ask me.

[00:15:00] [SPEAKER_01]: He came to town, there were women.

[00:15:03] [SPEAKER_01]: He left town, women gone.

[00:15:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Took them all.

[00:15:07] [SPEAKER_01]: There's not enough emphasis on the fact

[00:15:09] [SPEAKER_01]: that all the women are gone.

[00:15:10] [SPEAKER_02]: There's no world where Cotteney Joe

[00:15:11] [SPEAKER_02]: doesn't have a harem of women somewhere.

[00:15:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Maybe the song isn't above, maybe it should be canceled.

[00:15:17] [SPEAKER_00]: If you had harem of women on your bingo card today,

[00:15:21] [SPEAKER_00]: just check them all off, you won.

[00:15:23] [SPEAKER_02]: Check all the women off in that harem,

[00:15:25] [SPEAKER_02]: you know what I'm saying?

[00:15:28] [SPEAKER_02]: You should check, I wanted to say check it off.

[00:15:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Check off the bingo mark, no,

[00:15:32] [SPEAKER_02]: you should check them all off.

[00:15:34] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah like if, like all the bingo squares,

[00:15:35] [SPEAKER_00]: like you just want to check them, like you won.

[00:15:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh because you had that one,

[00:15:38] [SPEAKER_02]: you get all the bingo squares?

[00:15:39] [SPEAKER_00]: If you thought ahead to put harem of women

[00:15:42] [SPEAKER_00]: on your bingo card, then you just straight win.

[00:15:44] [SPEAKER_02]: That could still be not in the corner.

[00:15:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Free space.

[00:15:47] [SPEAKER_00]: No.

[00:15:48] [SPEAKER_02]: The free.

[00:15:49] [SPEAKER_02]: You mean check them all?

[00:15:49] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm saying you just straight win.

[00:15:51] [SPEAKER_01]: I just think there's gotta be some cards

[00:15:53] [SPEAKER_01]: that has harem of women on it, come on.

[00:15:56] [SPEAKER_01]: We would never fold it up.

[00:15:57] [SPEAKER_01]: That isn't the winner.

[00:15:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:15:59] [SPEAKER_01]: That's all we're saying.

[00:16:00] [SPEAKER_01]: It is not a guaranteed win.

[00:16:01] [SPEAKER_01]: It is.

[00:16:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Well where is it?

[00:16:04] [SPEAKER_00]: You can have this Delish.

[00:16:06] [SPEAKER_01]: Cut back to earlier in the day.

[00:16:08] [SPEAKER_01]: And we meet Danny.

[00:16:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Danny's convinced that it's not Christmas Eve morning.

[00:16:12] [SPEAKER_01]: But then he.

[00:16:14] [SPEAKER_01]: He might be, because he hates his parents.

[00:16:16] [SPEAKER_01]: He's 14 years old.

[00:16:18] [SPEAKER_01]: That's just being a kid but okay.

[00:16:19] [SPEAKER_01]: I know, but he only cares about himself.

[00:16:22] [SPEAKER_01]: And his uncle.

[00:16:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes and he loves his Uncle Nick.

[00:16:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Now his dad specifically,

[00:16:27] [SPEAKER_01]: because he's his brother, his uncle's brother.

[00:16:29] [SPEAKER_01]: You get it, he's not the brother of Danny.

[00:16:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Danny's dad is not his brother.

[00:16:34] [SPEAKER_01]: Contrary to what I may have said.

[00:16:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Contrary to what I might may have said.

[00:16:39] [SPEAKER_01]: He's like your.

[00:16:41] [SPEAKER_01]: Pato.

[00:16:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Uncle Nick is, what's quicker a sneeze

[00:16:48] [SPEAKER_01]: or a Cotteney joke coming in and taking all the women?

[00:16:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, Cotteney joke.

[00:16:53] [SPEAKER_01]: It happened so fast.

[00:16:54] [SPEAKER_01]: It's like this man.

[00:16:55] [SPEAKER_00]: It's 11 verses.

[00:16:56] [SPEAKER_02]: I was planning, I was.

[00:16:58] [SPEAKER_02]: That's the old song.

[00:16:59] [SPEAKER_05]: It's 11 verses and two bridges.

[00:17:01] [SPEAKER_02]: I had spent six months dating this woman.

[00:17:04] [SPEAKER_02]: I thought we were gonna get married.

[00:17:05] [SPEAKER_02]: We had plans.

[00:17:05] [SPEAKER_02]: We had a date on the book.

[00:17:07] [SPEAKER_02]: And then like a vapor, she gone.

[00:17:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Can you imagine?

[00:17:11] [SPEAKER_02]: Dude that's wild.

[00:17:12] [SPEAKER_01]: And it's not just her.

[00:17:14] [SPEAKER_01]: It's not just her that left.

[00:17:15] [SPEAKER_01]: It's all the ladies in town left

[00:17:18] [SPEAKER_01]: and went with Cotteney joke.

[00:17:21] [SPEAKER_01]: The reason why dad doesn't like his brother very much

[00:17:23] [SPEAKER_01]: is because he believes his brother is a con man.

[00:17:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Turns out he is.

[00:17:27] [SPEAKER_01]: It turns out he is, yes.

[00:17:28] [SPEAKER_01]: Nick finds himself in trouble.

[00:17:30] [SPEAKER_01]: He's a hacker of sorts.

[00:17:33] [SPEAKER_00]: He has some sort of online scam.

[00:17:35] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes, and he owes these criminal goobers,

[00:17:38] [SPEAKER_01]: Bill and Ted, Bill and Harry, $30,000.

[00:17:43] [SPEAKER_01]: They have an excellent, it's excellent.

[00:17:46] [SPEAKER_00]: An excellent adventure.

[00:17:48] [SPEAKER_01]: And Bill and Harry want their money back.

[00:17:50] [SPEAKER_01]: They have tied him up, Nick up and put a blindfold

[00:17:54] [SPEAKER_01]: which he's able to get off really easily.

[00:17:58] [SPEAKER_01]: And like we want our $30,000 back by Christmas morning.

[00:18:01] [SPEAKER_01]: That is when we want it back.

[00:18:02] [SPEAKER_01]: And if you don't, we've got the muscle.

[00:18:05] [SPEAKER_01]: We've got the muscle behind us

[00:18:06] [SPEAKER_01]: and there's this guy who's a threatening demeanor.

[00:18:11] [SPEAKER_01]: So Nick is able to escape these guys

[00:18:16] [SPEAKER_01]: because they go away for a little bit

[00:18:17] [SPEAKER_01]: and he runs off.

[00:18:19] [SPEAKER_01]: And in the process of running around,

[00:18:22] [SPEAKER_01]: he stumbles into this bathroom

[00:18:25] [SPEAKER_01]: and there is this North Pole festival thing going on.

[00:18:30] [SPEAKER_01]: And in the bathroom, in the stall.

[00:18:32] [SPEAKER_00]: There's like a meet Santa photo op happening.

[00:18:34] [SPEAKER_01]: In the stall taking a deuce, we assume,

[00:18:36] [SPEAKER_01]: we don't know for sure.

[00:18:38] [SPEAKER_01]: But the guy who was playing.

[00:18:40] [SPEAKER_01]: Do you have information we don't have?

[00:18:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Well he was sitting.

[00:18:43] [SPEAKER_02]: He was sitting down in a stall.

[00:18:45] [SPEAKER_02]: He also was getting changed.

[00:18:47] [SPEAKER_02]: His coat was off.

[00:18:48] [SPEAKER_02]: My understanding.

[00:18:50] [SPEAKER_02]: You think he took the coat off just to take a deuce?

[00:18:51] [SPEAKER_02]: 100%.

[00:18:52] [SPEAKER_02]: Yes, I do.

[00:18:52] [SPEAKER_01]: He knew the battle that was about to transpire

[00:18:55] [SPEAKER_01]: in that stall.

[00:18:56] [SPEAKER_01]: Sometimes you go into a stall

[00:18:58] [SPEAKER_01]: or your bathroom or whatever.

[00:19:00] [SPEAKER_01]: And you take your jacket off.

[00:19:00] [SPEAKER_00]: He would have been in the bigger stall.

[00:19:03] [SPEAKER_01]: You know, you know.

[00:19:04] [SPEAKER_00]: You're not getting changed in a regular stall.

[00:19:06] [SPEAKER_00]: No.

[00:19:07] [SPEAKER_01]: You've never been wearing a jacket or something, Dan,

[00:19:10] [SPEAKER_01]: and you had to drop a deuce

[00:19:11] [SPEAKER_01]: and you've been like I gotta take this jacket off.

[00:19:12] [SPEAKER_01]: I try not to wear jackets ever.

[00:19:13] [SPEAKER_00]: Do you remember when we were watching this movie,

[00:19:14] [SPEAKER_00]: did you think the bathroom scene

[00:19:15] [SPEAKER_00]: would have this much discussion?

[00:19:17] [SPEAKER_02]: I didn't think it would have any

[00:19:18] [SPEAKER_02]: because I'd like to be done with this podcast

[00:19:20] [SPEAKER_02]: and under the length of Lawrence of Arabia.

[00:19:22] [SPEAKER_02]: There's no world where we were gonna talk about this.

[00:19:26] [SPEAKER_02]: There's no world.

[00:19:27] [SPEAKER_02]: You pushed back even though I had

[00:19:29] [SPEAKER_02]: clearly the right information.

[00:19:31] [SPEAKER_02]: For no reason you pushed back.

[00:19:32] [SPEAKER_02]: It was not that you said he's in there dropping a deuce

[00:19:35] [SPEAKER_02]: and you said presumably.

[00:19:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:19:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Like it was up for debate.

[00:19:38] [SPEAKER_02]: So I decided to jump into the debate with you.

[00:19:42] [SPEAKER_01]: There's no way I can confirm I didn't see the poop.

[00:19:45] [SPEAKER_01]: So I can't confirm it.

[00:19:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.

[00:19:47] [SPEAKER_02]: But from everything that we do see,

[00:19:51] [SPEAKER_02]: he's taking a deuce.

[00:19:53] [SPEAKER_02]: And do you think that's cotton eye Joe?

[00:19:56] [SPEAKER_01]: Do you think that's him?

[00:19:57] [SPEAKER_01]: What else is his face?

[00:19:58] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't think so.

[00:19:59] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't think so.

[00:20:00] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't think cotton eye Joe poops.

[00:20:02] [SPEAKER_01]: What?

[00:20:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:20:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Wow.

[00:20:05] [SPEAKER_01]: What a discussion for a different day.

[00:20:08] [SPEAKER_01]: You will get to it later.

[00:20:11] [SPEAKER_01]: So he sees the jacket over top of the door

[00:20:15] [SPEAKER_01]: as Dan mentioned because it's a big one.

[00:20:18] [SPEAKER_02]: And he then takes.

[00:20:20] [SPEAKER_02]: There's also a hook on the inside

[00:20:21] [SPEAKER_02]: of most every bathroom door.

[00:20:22] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, not this one.

[00:20:23] [SPEAKER_02]: He throws it right over the.

[00:20:24] [SPEAKER_01]: So that's it was, he was in a hurry.

[00:20:27] [SPEAKER_01]: He runs into the bathroom and he's like,

[00:20:28] [SPEAKER_01]: I can't deal with the hook right now.

[00:20:30] [SPEAKER_01]: I just got to throw this thing over.

[00:20:33] [SPEAKER_01]: And so he sees that he grabs a jacket

[00:20:35] [SPEAKER_01]: and then luckily for Nick,

[00:20:38] [SPEAKER_01]: the boots were attached to the pants.

[00:20:41] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:20:41] [SPEAKER_01]: So he pulls pants shoes.

[00:20:44] [SPEAKER_01]: They all come off leaving that Santa naked.

[00:20:48] [SPEAKER_01]: Again, presumably we don't see him,

[00:20:50] [SPEAKER_01]: but it's all an assumption.

[00:20:52] [SPEAKER_01]: So he now puts on the costume.

[00:20:55] [SPEAKER_01]: He walks out and the muscle is none the wiser

[00:20:59] [SPEAKER_01]: as to where he is.

[00:21:01] [SPEAKER_01]: They have a little interaction.

[00:21:02] [SPEAKER_01]: It's a big funny ha ha's.

[00:21:03] [SPEAKER_01]: And so Nick now has to go.

[00:21:06] [SPEAKER_01]: Nick now has to find safety.

[00:21:09] [SPEAKER_01]: And where does he go?

[00:21:10] [SPEAKER_01]: But his brother's house.

[00:21:11] [SPEAKER_00]: There's no place like home for the holidays.

[00:21:12] [SPEAKER_01]: That's exactly right.

[00:21:13] [SPEAKER_01]: His brother's home for the holidays, yeah.

[00:21:15] [SPEAKER_01]: His brother is confused because he wasn't expecting him.

[00:21:19] [SPEAKER_01]: And that doesn't matter though to Danny

[00:21:21] [SPEAKER_01]: because Danny is pumped.

[00:21:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Adopted.

[00:21:24] [SPEAKER_01]: Fun again, everybody that's listening

[00:21:26] [SPEAKER_01]: that doesn't listen to like the hallmark,

[00:21:29] [SPEAKER_01]: that's a callback is what we call in the biz

[00:21:31] [SPEAKER_01]: to another podcast.

[00:21:33] [SPEAKER_02]: And we typically don't like use callbacks but.

[00:21:39] [SPEAKER_00]: Danny is adopted.

[00:21:40] [SPEAKER_00]: Danny's adopted.

[00:21:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Sorry.

[00:21:42] [SPEAKER_02]: And so.

[00:21:43] [SPEAKER_01]: Thank you.

[00:21:44] [SPEAKER_01]: But that's a callback that makes sense, Dan

[00:21:46] [SPEAKER_01]: because we did it on this show is all I'm saying.

[00:21:48] [SPEAKER_01]: That's why I had to.

[00:21:49] [SPEAKER_02]: It's not the first time we mentioned Danny's adopted.

[00:21:50] [SPEAKER_02]: I was calling back.

[00:21:53] [SPEAKER_00]: Danny adopted is the one and only time

[00:21:54] [SPEAKER_00]: I've written an angry letter.

[00:21:55] [SPEAKER_02]: I gotta be honest, people jump in with this episode first

[00:21:56] [SPEAKER_02]: they're not listening to another one.

[00:21:57] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah they are, we're having fun.

[00:21:59] [SPEAKER_02]: We have a lot of fun here.

[00:21:59] [SPEAKER_00]: We have a lot of fun here.

[00:22:01] [SPEAKER_01]: You know who has a lot of fun though?

[00:22:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Cotton Eye Joe.

[00:22:03] [SPEAKER_01]: That's exactly right.

[00:22:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Cotton Eye Joe 100% is a ton of fun.

[00:22:06] [SPEAKER_02]: So Danny's parents are both on call the same night

[00:22:08] [SPEAKER_02]: and that night is Christmas Eve.

[00:22:10] [SPEAKER_01]: I think in Cotton Eye Joe's heart of hearts

[00:22:12] [SPEAKER_01]: when he lays down, puts his head on the pillow.

[00:22:16] [SPEAKER_01]: That on his pillow.

[00:22:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Puts his head on his pillow at night.

[00:22:18] [SPEAKER_01]: He realizes that he's still living an empty life.

[00:22:21] [SPEAKER_01]: That he's chasing that high

[00:22:24] [SPEAKER_01]: of getting all the women in town to join him.

[00:22:26] [SPEAKER_01]: And go to hell.

[00:22:27] [SPEAKER_01]: And go to hell.

[00:22:28] [SPEAKER_01]: That's not gonna last forever.

[00:22:30] [SPEAKER_01]: His luck's gonna run out.

[00:22:33] [SPEAKER_00]: What if he had a lucky coin?

[00:22:36] [SPEAKER_01]: So his parents do need to go to the doctors.

[00:22:41] [SPEAKER_01]: They're doctors.

[00:22:44] [SPEAKER_01]: They need to go to the doctor.

[00:22:47] [SPEAKER_00]: They are doctors in the emergency room.

[00:22:50] [SPEAKER_00]: They get called, they're on call.

[00:22:51] [SPEAKER_02]: They have an appointment.

[00:22:52] [SPEAKER_00]: They're both on call for the same night.

[00:22:54] [SPEAKER_00]: Which makes sense when you have young children.

[00:22:55] [SPEAKER_02]: They don't have their yearly physical

[00:22:57] [SPEAKER_02]: on Christmas Eve night.

[00:22:58] [SPEAKER_00]: You think it would fit us both in?

[00:23:02] [SPEAKER_02]: I'll wear a suit.

[00:23:03] [SPEAKER_02]: Hello urgent care.

[00:23:05] [SPEAKER_02]: It is not urgent but I would love to be visited.

[00:23:08] [SPEAKER_02]: I'll wear a suit.

[00:23:09] [SPEAKER_02]: She'll wear whatever that is.

[00:23:11] [SPEAKER_00]: Mom gets the call.

[00:23:12] [SPEAKER_00]: She will not change.

[00:23:13] [SPEAKER_00]: She's ready to go.

[00:23:14] [SPEAKER_00]: She's like great we got the call.

[00:23:15] [SPEAKER_00]: We have to get to the emergency room.

[00:23:17] [SPEAKER_00]: And dad's like I'm gonna go put on a three piece suit.

[00:23:19] [SPEAKER_00]: Be back.

[00:23:19] [SPEAKER_02]: I can't just show up at doctors to doctor.

[00:23:22] [SPEAKER_01]: No, can't do that.

[00:23:24] [SPEAKER_01]: So that leaves Nick now in charge of the family.

[00:23:30] [SPEAKER_01]: And so he after the kids go to bed,

[00:23:33] [SPEAKER_01]: he is on his lappy as he calls it, laptop.

[00:23:37] [SPEAKER_01]: And trying to figure out a way to get $30,000.

[00:23:40] [SPEAKER_01]: Try to search the internet.

[00:23:42] [SPEAKER_01]: All that good stuff.

[00:23:43] [SPEAKER_01]: And suddenly a video of the Goobers

[00:23:50] [SPEAKER_01]: does appear on his screen

[00:23:52] [SPEAKER_01]: and he realizes that he is being hacked himself.

[00:23:55] [SPEAKER_01]: And they're like we're coming for you.

[00:23:56] [SPEAKER_01]: We know where you are even though you ran away,

[00:23:58] [SPEAKER_01]: blah, blah, blah.

[00:23:59] [SPEAKER_01]: And so luckily though he has a virus ready to go.

[00:24:03] [SPEAKER_01]: So he viruses.

[00:24:04] [SPEAKER_00]: He says for just an occasion.

[00:24:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah so he viruses.

[00:24:07] [SPEAKER_01]: He puts the virus over top of their video

[00:24:09] [SPEAKER_01]: which affects them.

[00:24:13] [SPEAKER_01]: But also everybody within what is it a 50 mile radius?

[00:24:17] [SPEAKER_01]: That's how that works.

[00:24:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Which that's tough.

[00:24:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah 2001 that's impressive man.

[00:24:21] [SPEAKER_00]: I did look up the synopsis for this scene

[00:24:23] [SPEAKER_00]: because I was very confused.

[00:24:25] [SPEAKER_00]: We were all confused about how the technology was working.

[00:24:28] [SPEAKER_00]: Apparently it's not a live feed.

[00:24:30] [SPEAKER_00]: They sent a video email of them being like

[00:24:33] [SPEAKER_00]: we're tracking you, we're gonna get you.

[00:24:35] [SPEAKER_00]: So he was just watching a video

[00:24:37] [SPEAKER_00]: and then by it was just hacking back into their email.

[00:24:41] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah no none of it is how it works.

[00:24:43] [SPEAKER_00]: But it makes more sense in a live feed video.

[00:24:44] [SPEAKER_01]: I thought it was a lot because it just appears.

[00:24:46] [SPEAKER_01]: It seemed as if they were hacking in

[00:24:48] [SPEAKER_01]: and being like hey here we are,

[00:24:50] [SPEAKER_01]: we're showing you us.

[00:24:50] [SPEAKER_00]: No the internet said that it was like an email.

[00:24:52] [SPEAKER_01]: I think the internet is full of hogwash.

[00:24:54] [SPEAKER_01]: That's what I think.

[00:24:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Full of, you think it's full of hogwash?

[00:24:57] [SPEAKER_01]: I think it's 100% certified hogwash.

[00:25:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Wow.

[00:25:00] [SPEAKER_00]: It's almost like 2001 Disney wasn't quite sure

[00:25:03] [SPEAKER_00]: how to do technology.

[00:25:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah fair.

[00:25:05] [SPEAKER_02]: If you think that the song Cotton Eye Joe

[00:25:07] [SPEAKER_02]: is gonna play in this movie at some point,

[00:25:09] [SPEAKER_02]: you are sorely mistaken.

[00:25:10] [SPEAKER_02]: It doesn't and I do apologize.

[00:25:12] [SPEAKER_02]: To be upfront about that right now

[00:25:14] [SPEAKER_02]: with all that talk earlier.

[00:25:15] [SPEAKER_02]: You think it's coming back, it's not.

[00:25:17] [SPEAKER_01]: If you're lucky we'll play it at the end.

[00:25:18] [SPEAKER_02]: That's right if we have the rights.

[00:25:20] [SPEAKER_02]: We don't have the rights.

[00:25:20] [SPEAKER_02]: You'll know if we have the rights if we play it.

[00:25:22] [SPEAKER_02]: That's exactly right.

[00:25:23] [SPEAKER_02]: You'll know.

[00:25:24] [SPEAKER_01]: One thing is rights and that this is.

[00:25:29] [SPEAKER_01]: And so he's like oh I guess that's that

[00:25:31] [SPEAKER_01]: and suddenly he begins to hear some

[00:25:36] [SPEAKER_01]: stomp, stomp, stomps on the roof

[00:25:38] [SPEAKER_01]: which wakes up Danny or Danny was already awake.

[00:25:40] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't know but Danny comes down

[00:25:41] [SPEAKER_01]: and he's like what's going on there?

[00:25:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Suddenly the two of them freeze.

[00:25:45] [SPEAKER_01]: It's a freeze boy.

[00:25:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah it is.

[00:25:50] [SPEAKER_01]: And particles begin to come down the fireplace

[00:25:54] [SPEAKER_01]: and into the living room

[00:25:55] [SPEAKER_01]: and they kind of swirl around

[00:25:57] [SPEAKER_01]: and then boom it's Santa.

[00:25:59] [SPEAKER_01]: That's how Santa comes down chimneys.

[00:26:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Particles, it's the particle situation

[00:26:03] [SPEAKER_01]: and he has a thing like a ball

[00:26:08] [SPEAKER_01]: that has different features.

[00:26:11] [SPEAKER_01]: One being freeze, one being particles,

[00:26:14] [SPEAKER_01]: one being shrink and one being big boy.

[00:26:18] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah big boy.

[00:26:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Just unshrink?

[00:26:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Like could he make things like way bigger?

[00:26:23] [SPEAKER_02]: Big boy.

[00:26:24] [SPEAKER_02]: Big boy.

[00:26:24] [SPEAKER_02]: Big boy from our past.

[00:26:25] [SPEAKER_02]: Particles, freeze, shrink and big boy.

[00:26:27] [SPEAKER_00]: We had an entire discussion about

[00:26:29] [SPEAKER_00]: the science behind big boy

[00:26:30] [SPEAKER_00]: but we wasted that time on Cotton Eye Joe.

[00:26:32] [SPEAKER_00]: So we're gonna skip it.

[00:26:32] [SPEAKER_01]: There's another thing we can do.

[00:26:33] [SPEAKER_01]: Skip, skip, big boy.

[00:26:33] [SPEAKER_01]: Just know that whenever you listen to OutKast

[00:26:36] [SPEAKER_01]: you can thank Santa.

[00:26:39] [SPEAKER_01]: So they are beginning to,

[00:26:42] [SPEAKER_01]: like Santa is like I gotta.

[00:26:43] [SPEAKER_01]: I got it, took me a second.

[00:26:45] [SPEAKER_01]: So Santa's got to find out where this virus

[00:26:50] [SPEAKER_01]: has come from and delete the virus.

[00:26:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Ba da ba.

[00:26:54] [SPEAKER_01]: And so he finds the house,

[00:26:56] [SPEAKER_01]: goes to the laptop, the lappy I'm sorry,

[00:26:59] [SPEAKER_01]: deletes the virus.

[00:27:00] [SPEAKER_00]: Which is all it takes.

[00:27:01] [SPEAKER_00]: You just put that virus right in the trash can.

[00:27:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Pop, pop then it's done.

[00:27:05] [SPEAKER_01]: He doesn't even right click delete permanently.

[00:27:07] [SPEAKER_01]: He just throws it in the trash can.

[00:27:08] [SPEAKER_01]: It's just living in the trash can

[00:27:09] [SPEAKER_00]: but once it's in the trash can you can't hack anymore.

[00:27:11] [SPEAKER_01]: It can affect you.

[00:27:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Trash is trash.

[00:27:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Trash is trash.

[00:27:15] [SPEAKER_00]: We know how computers work.

[00:27:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Begins to slowly do what Santa does

[00:27:20] [SPEAKER_01]: and we see that Santa has a big bag

[00:27:23] [SPEAKER_01]: full of tiny packages which he puts under the tree

[00:27:26] [SPEAKER_01]: and then he makes some big boys.

[00:27:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Which I've never seen as a Santa move.

[00:27:29] [SPEAKER_01]: I liked it.

[00:27:30] [SPEAKER_02]: It was something.

[00:27:31] [SPEAKER_02]: There's a lot of ways it could go wrong.

[00:27:33] [SPEAKER_02]: Yes, of course.

[00:27:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Lots of ways.

[00:27:34] [SPEAKER_02]: What is this?

[00:27:35] [SPEAKER_02]: I can't really tell.

[00:27:36] [SPEAKER_00]: I just imagine the magic is like he reaches in

[00:27:39] [SPEAKER_00]: and it's the right present.

[00:27:40] [SPEAKER_01]: Can I ask you guys this?

[00:27:41] [SPEAKER_01]: Do you think that is the science

[00:27:43] [SPEAKER_01]: behind how Cotton Eye Joe does it?

[00:27:46] [SPEAKER_01]: He makes all the women tiny?

[00:27:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes, that's how he gets them around.

[00:27:49] [SPEAKER_01]: This is all a night?

[00:27:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Listen, I'm just spit falling.

[00:27:52] [SPEAKER_02]: I think they're coming with him

[00:27:55] [SPEAKER_02]: of their own consent and free will.

[00:27:57] [SPEAKER_01]: No, no, no, I'm not saying that he's doing it.

[00:28:02] [SPEAKER_02]: I think Cotton Eye Joe is that suave.

[00:28:03] [SPEAKER_02]: I think he's that.

[00:28:04] [SPEAKER_02]: He comes into town and everybody's like who is this?

[00:28:06] [SPEAKER_02]: Who is this dude?

[00:28:07] [SPEAKER_01]: You're misunderstanding what I'm saying.

[00:28:08] [SPEAKER_01]: I 100% believe that he is above.

[00:28:09] [SPEAKER_02]: It's like when you show up at a Christmas party

[00:28:10] [SPEAKER_02]: in your Christmas sweater,

[00:28:12] [SPEAKER_02]: everybody's like who's that guy?

[00:28:13] [SPEAKER_02]: It's like that.

[00:28:14] [SPEAKER_02]: But all the time and all the barns

[00:28:16] [SPEAKER_02]: and all the dances around the world.

[00:28:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes, he is above board.

[00:28:20] [SPEAKER_01]: 100%.

[00:28:20] [SPEAKER_01]: When the women say I would like to come with you,

[00:28:22] [SPEAKER_01]: like you can't get a vehicle large enough

[00:28:25] [SPEAKER_01]: for all the women is all I'm saying.

[00:28:27] [SPEAKER_02]: They're driving themselves.

[00:28:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.

[00:28:29] [SPEAKER_02]: You think there's one big hullabaloo?

[00:28:30] [SPEAKER_03]: I thought maybe.

[00:28:33] [SPEAKER_02]: There's one big carrot, like he's got a big like.

[00:28:36] [SPEAKER_03]: I thought maybe he had a van.

[00:28:38] [SPEAKER_02]: He's got, is it unmarked?

[00:28:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Maybe no windows?

[00:28:41] [SPEAKER_02]: No, it's cool.

[00:28:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Then he's putting all the little women in it.

[00:28:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Not Alcott's little men,

[00:28:44] [SPEAKER_02]: the women of the, the shrunk women.

[00:28:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Although the little women would be if they met him.

[00:28:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Joe would be all over Cotton Eye Joe.

[00:28:52] [SPEAKER_02]: You know that Joe and Joe get out of fight.

[00:28:54] [SPEAKER_02]: They'd fight about it.

[00:28:55] [SPEAKER_02]: They would, you know they would.

[00:28:57] [SPEAKER_02]: That's what little women's all about, right?

[00:28:59] [SPEAKER_02]: You find your man?

[00:29:02] [SPEAKER_01]: No.

[00:29:03] [SPEAKER_01]: So which of the guys in little women is Cotton Eye Joe?

[00:29:06] [SPEAKER_01]: Trevor.

[00:29:08] [SPEAKER_02]: Like two men in Cotton Eye Joe.

[00:29:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Who's Shalome?

[00:29:11] [SPEAKER_02]: Who's Shalome, darling?

[00:29:13] [SPEAKER_02]: But.

[00:29:13] [SPEAKER_02]: He's Teddy.

[00:29:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Teddy.

[00:29:15] [SPEAKER_02]: Teddy's got.

[00:29:16] [SPEAKER_02]: Teddy ball game.

[00:29:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Neighbor Teddy.

[00:29:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes.

[00:29:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Cause the littlest of the women also has a crush on.

[00:29:22] [SPEAKER_02]: So you're saying that they're all like,

[00:29:24] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah we definitely are coming with you Cotton Eye Joe.

[00:29:26] [SPEAKER_02]: And then he shrinks them.

[00:29:28] [SPEAKER_02]: They're like, treat me.

[00:29:29] [SPEAKER_01]: It was an idea.

[00:29:29] [SPEAKER_01]: I didn't, yeah.

[00:29:30] [SPEAKER_02]: He belittles the women and then he puts them all

[00:29:32] [SPEAKER_02]: in an unmarked van.

[00:29:34] [SPEAKER_02]: And so there's thousands of women.

[00:29:35] [SPEAKER_02]: When you say.

[00:29:37] [SPEAKER_02]: There's thousands of women.

[00:29:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Miniaturized by their own volition.

[00:29:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah until they get back to.

[00:29:43] [SPEAKER_02]: In an unmarked van.

[00:29:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Until they get back to wherever he lives.

[00:29:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Where does he live?

[00:29:46] [SPEAKER_00]: Where are we in the plot?

[00:29:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Santa's there.

[00:29:50] [SPEAKER_02]: He's got a ball that is, does a shrink.

[00:29:52] [SPEAKER_02]: We need to make some moves.

[00:29:54] [SPEAKER_02]: We are still the house.

[00:29:56] [SPEAKER_02]: Here we go, we're up against it.

[00:29:57] [SPEAKER_02]: How dare you keep us on track?

[00:29:59] [SPEAKER_02]: We're up against it.

[00:29:59] [SPEAKER_00]: We're gonna get right off track in about three seconds.

[00:30:02] [SPEAKER_00]: What if we could just stay on track for.

[00:30:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Santa's hella kinky too.

[00:30:06] [SPEAKER_01]: We picked a bad day.

[00:30:06] [SPEAKER_01]: We haven't even gotten to kinky Santa.

[00:30:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Okay hold on, hold on, hold on.

[00:30:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Santa's so kinky.

[00:30:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Santa drops the ball literally.

[00:30:11] [SPEAKER_01]: And the ball rolls over and to the feet of Nick.

[00:30:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Not Saint Nick but regular Nick.

[00:30:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Regular Nick.

[00:30:19] [SPEAKER_01]: And when the ball hits the floor, they unfreeze.

[00:30:22] [SPEAKER_00]: When the body's hitting off the skin.

[00:30:25] [SPEAKER_01]: And Santa.

[00:30:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Gotta get on track over here.

[00:30:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Santa has apparently never been in a predicament before

[00:30:29] [SPEAKER_01]: where people are unfrozen around him.

[00:30:31] [SPEAKER_01]: This causes him to freak out

[00:30:32] [SPEAKER_01]: and he just kind of stumbles around

[00:30:33] [SPEAKER_01]: until he hits his head.

[00:30:35] [SPEAKER_00]: I get the feeling Santa has never spoken to a human.

[00:30:37] [SPEAKER_00]: He's never spoken to a human before.

[00:30:38] [SPEAKER_02]: The way he talks would suggest that he says process,

[00:30:41] [SPEAKER_02]: not process.

[00:30:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Yes.

[00:30:42] [SPEAKER_00]: It's the process.

[00:30:43] [SPEAKER_00]: The process.

[00:30:44] [SPEAKER_00]: So Danny.

[00:30:45] [SPEAKER_00]: He's fancy.

[00:30:45] [SPEAKER_00]: He's a fancy boy.

[00:30:46] [SPEAKER_01]: He's fancy.

[00:30:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Fancy is the process.

[00:30:48] [SPEAKER_01]: So Danny is like we gotta do the job.

[00:30:51] [SPEAKER_01]: Santa's knocked out.

[00:30:52] [SPEAKER_01]: We gotta be Santa.

[00:30:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:30:54] [SPEAKER_00]: Someone has to deliver these presents.

[00:30:55] [SPEAKER_01]: And so now with the power of the ball,

[00:30:58] [SPEAKER_01]: they have the ability to do that.

[00:31:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Nick at first is out on this idea.

[00:31:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Then he realizes the power of the ball.

[00:31:06] [SPEAKER_02]: I can freeze.

[00:31:07] [SPEAKER_02]: I can turn into molecules.

[00:31:09] [SPEAKER_02]: I can shrink and I can big boy.

[00:31:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes.

[00:31:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Cool.

[00:31:12] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes.

[00:31:12] [SPEAKER_01]: It's like a crazy game of bop it.

[00:31:15] [SPEAKER_01]: And so.

[00:31:16] Shrinking.

[00:31:16] [SPEAKER_02]: Big boy.

[00:31:18] [SPEAKER_02]: And so freeze it.

[00:31:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Molecules it.

[00:31:21] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know how that one fits in.

[00:31:22] [SPEAKER_02]: But we'll get there.

[00:31:23] [SPEAKER_02]: Disintegrate it.

[00:31:23] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know.

[00:31:24] [SPEAKER_02]: His plan.

[00:31:25] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, it's longer than molecules.

[00:31:27] [SPEAKER_01]: So his plan is to go into all of these houses

[00:31:31] [SPEAKER_01]: and find expensive items,

[00:31:32] [SPEAKER_01]: shrink it down,

[00:31:33] [SPEAKER_01]: put it in his pocket

[00:31:34] [SPEAKER_01]: and then sell it so that he can pay back the baddies.

[00:31:37] [SPEAKER_01]: And then.

[00:31:37] [SPEAKER_02]: We're about to move very fast here,

[00:31:39] [SPEAKER_02]: but you need to know something.

[00:31:41] [SPEAKER_02]: This man needs $30,000.

[00:31:44] [SPEAKER_02]: That's all he needs.

[00:31:46] [SPEAKER_02]: He can get that so many ways,

[00:31:48] [SPEAKER_02]: walking into one convenience store,

[00:31:50] [SPEAKER_02]: freezing everyone, emptying out the registers,

[00:31:52] [SPEAKER_02]: probably would do it.

[00:31:53] [SPEAKER_02]: In like a Best Buy or something.

[00:31:55] [SPEAKER_02]: It's 2001.

[00:31:56] [SPEAKER_00]: A Best Buy on Christmas Eve?

[00:31:58] [SPEAKER_02]: It's 2001.

[00:31:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Everybody's paying with cash.

[00:31:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.

[00:32:00] [SPEAKER_02]: Maybe there's a toy chest out there.

[00:32:02] [SPEAKER_02]: He's doing Duncan's toy chest.

[00:32:03] [SPEAKER_02]: Maybe.

[00:32:03] [SPEAKER_02]: For instance, two turtle ducks.

[00:32:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Who could say?

[00:32:05] [SPEAKER_02]: Here's what he does instead.

[00:32:07] [SPEAKER_02]: He decides I'm going to get priceless artifacts

[00:32:10] [SPEAKER_02]: like a Stradivarius violin,

[00:32:12] [SPEAKER_02]: which happens to be in the third house they go to.

[00:32:14] [SPEAKER_00]: Oh yeah, I was gonna say

[00:32:15] [SPEAKER_00]: the Stradivarius comes later.

[00:32:17] [SPEAKER_00]: Yes.

[00:32:17] [SPEAKER_00]: At first he's stealing couch cushions

[00:32:19] [SPEAKER_00]: and ottomans.

[00:32:21] [SPEAKER_02]: And a grand piano.

[00:32:22] [SPEAKER_02]: And he is doing all this.

[00:32:23] [SPEAKER_00]: It's not even a grand piano.

[00:32:24] [SPEAKER_02]: And a piano.

[00:32:25] [SPEAKER_02]: Just a piano.

[00:32:25] [SPEAKER_02]: But the problem is that not only is it so inefficient,

[00:32:29] [SPEAKER_02]: he's also making way more than 30,000.

[00:32:32] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:32:32] [SPEAKER_02]: Like not even enough to make it like,

[00:32:34] [SPEAKER_02]: just come back late, like pay the thing off.

[00:32:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Like it doesn't make any sense.

[00:32:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Back to you.

[00:32:38] [SPEAKER_00]: Yes.

[00:32:38] [SPEAKER_00]: So.

[00:32:39] [SPEAKER_00]: It's a very inefficient heist.

[00:32:41] [SPEAKER_01]: So Danny believes all they're doing

[00:32:43] [SPEAKER_01]: is delivering presents

[00:32:44] [SPEAKER_01]: and he actually comes up with this idea

[00:32:45] [SPEAKER_01]: of whenever he comes across a kid that is naughty,

[00:32:48] [SPEAKER_01]: a naughty boy.

[00:32:50] [SPEAKER_01]: He then makes them nice

[00:32:52] [SPEAKER_01]: and gives them a present that will help them

[00:32:54] [SPEAKER_01]: maybe in their quest for niceness.

[00:32:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Danny's out here just thinking.

[00:32:57] [SPEAKER_01]: It's what Santa probably,

[00:32:59] [SPEAKER_02]: this is like rehabilitative Santa should be doing.

[00:33:02] [SPEAKER_02]: I saw Rehab Santa Live.

[00:33:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh man.

[00:33:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Really good.

[00:33:05] [SPEAKER_01]: How was it?

[00:33:05] [SPEAKER_01]: It was a dry bar but it was really good.

[00:33:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Really good joke.

[00:33:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Different rehab.

[00:33:09] [SPEAKER_00]: I mean there's like a naughty child

[00:33:12] [SPEAKER_00]: who wanted a pony

[00:33:13] [SPEAKER_00]: and since she's on the naughty list,

[00:33:15] [SPEAKER_00]: Santa gives her an ant farm.

[00:33:16] [SPEAKER_00]: Which.

[00:33:17] [SPEAKER_00]: An alien ant farm.

[00:33:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Just in general.

[00:33:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Not even an alien ant farm, just a regular.

[00:33:20] [SPEAKER_02]: People have the capability of good

[00:33:22] [SPEAKER_02]: and they've gotten off track somewhere.

[00:33:24] [SPEAKER_02]: What's the better thing to do?

[00:33:26] [SPEAKER_02]: Give them coal to reestablish their badness

[00:33:28] [SPEAKER_02]: or be like, hey, remember this thing that you love.

[00:33:31] [SPEAKER_00]: So Danny comes across.

[00:33:32] [SPEAKER_02]: That's the best idea of this movie.

[00:33:34] [SPEAKER_00]: Danny comes across a child who is on the naughty list

[00:33:36] [SPEAKER_00]: cause he gets in trouble for fighting.

[00:33:38] [SPEAKER_00]: So Danny gives him a punching bag thinking

[00:33:40] [SPEAKER_00]: he can use this.

[00:33:41] [SPEAKER_00]: Easy.

[00:33:42] [SPEAKER_00]: To get some of that anger out here.

[00:33:44] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[00:33:44] [SPEAKER_00]: Gives him a safe, constructive way to direct that anger

[00:33:49] [SPEAKER_00]: and maybe that will help him.

[00:33:50] [SPEAKER_00]: And we're like Danny.

[00:33:53] [SPEAKER_00]: And Nick's over there stealing diamonds.

[00:33:56] [SPEAKER_01]: So while all this is happening,

[00:33:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Danny's siblings, Kmart Spencer Breslin

[00:34:00] [SPEAKER_01]: and a girl named Caitlin.

[00:34:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Wake up.

[00:34:03] [SPEAKER_02]: Kmart Spencer Breslin.

[00:34:05] [SPEAKER_02]: Wake.

[00:34:05] [SPEAKER_02]: Miracle Hills Spencer Breslin.

[00:34:07] [SPEAKER_01]: Who me?

[00:34:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Who me?

[00:34:09] [SPEAKER_04]: Oh shucks, I gotta go potty.

[00:34:10] [SPEAKER_04]: I gotta tinkle.

[00:34:12] [SPEAKER_04]: Can you take me to the bathroom?

[00:34:13] [SPEAKER_04]: I gotta go bathroom.

[00:34:15] [SPEAKER_04]: Love you buddy.

[00:34:16] [SPEAKER_04]: Okay, I'll go right here.

[00:34:17] [SPEAKER_04]: He's great.

[00:34:19] [SPEAKER_04]: He's not great.

[00:34:21] [SPEAKER_04]: He's terrible.

[00:34:22] [SPEAKER_00]: He speaks like a 10 year old child most of the movie

[00:34:24] [SPEAKER_00]: and then at the halfway point he's four.

[00:34:26] [SPEAKER_00]: What if I'm four?

[00:34:28] [SPEAKER_00]: What if I'm four?

[00:34:29] [SPEAKER_00]: And it was a drastic change in dialogue.

[00:34:31] [SPEAKER_01]: So they find Santa lying on their floor

[00:34:34] [SPEAKER_01]: and that they are the ones that actually tie him up

[00:34:36] [SPEAKER_01]: from the beginning.

[00:34:37] [SPEAKER_01]: This what?

[00:34:39] [SPEAKER_00]: Eight and 12 year old.

[00:34:40] [SPEAKER_02]: And Santa's three bills.

[00:34:42] [SPEAKER_00]: Santa and hoist him into a chair.

[00:34:44] [SPEAKER_02]: This is a terrible Santa Claus,

[00:34:46] [SPEAKER_02]: but there's make no mistake, dude is huge.

[00:34:48] [SPEAKER_02]: He is huge.

[00:34:49] [SPEAKER_02]: In this movie the guy playing Santa

[00:34:51] [SPEAKER_02]: has gotta be 300 pounds at least.

[00:34:52] [SPEAKER_02]: And these two children.

[00:34:55] [SPEAKER_02]: He's big.

[00:34:55] [SPEAKER_02]: He's big boy.

[00:34:56] [SPEAKER_02]: He's a tall drink of water.

[00:34:57] [SPEAKER_00]: And they just put him in a chair like it's no big deal.

[00:35:00] [SPEAKER_00]: Unconscious, dead weight.

[00:35:02] [SPEAKER_00]: It's easy.

[00:35:02] [SPEAKER_00]: No big deal.

[00:35:03] [SPEAKER_01]: It's easy.

[00:35:04] [SPEAKER_00]: They've been training for this.

[00:35:05] [SPEAKER_01]: They are quickly convinced though

[00:35:07] [SPEAKER_01]: that he is indeed Santa

[00:35:09] [SPEAKER_01]: and because he knows things like,

[00:35:10] [SPEAKER_01]: hey, you cheated on a math test or whatever it is.

[00:35:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Also the sister's the smartest person.

[00:35:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes.

[00:35:14] [SPEAKER_01]: So that helps as well.

[00:35:15] [SPEAKER_01]: So Caitlin is very smart

[00:35:17] [SPEAKER_01]: and they basically work with Santa.

[00:35:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Santa's like the only way that I can think

[00:35:22] [SPEAKER_01]: to figure out where my sleigh is

[00:35:24] [SPEAKER_01]: and all this stuff is if we hack into the system.

[00:35:26] [SPEAKER_01]: And Caitlin's like,

[00:35:27] [SPEAKER_01]: well, we've got a computer,

[00:35:27] [SPEAKER_01]: but it's not nearly big enough.

[00:35:28] [SPEAKER_01]: So we gotta go to the computer store

[00:35:30] [SPEAKER_01]: which is still open

[00:35:30] [SPEAKER_01]: because there is a certain time of night.

[00:35:34] [SPEAKER_01]: And maybe then we can hack in through that computer

[00:35:37] [SPEAKER_01]: at the computer store

[00:35:38] [SPEAKER_01]: because it certainly is big enough.

[00:35:41] [SPEAKER_01]: So Santa never driven a car before,

[00:35:43] [SPEAKER_01]: gets in the behind the wheel

[00:35:45] [SPEAKER_01]: and does a worse job

[00:35:46] [SPEAKER_01]: than I think the kids would have done

[00:35:47] [SPEAKER_01]: if they just drove

[00:35:48] [SPEAKER_01]: since they actually have experience in a car.

[00:35:50] [SPEAKER_01]: But anyway, they get to the computer store.

[00:35:53] [SPEAKER_05]: He's doing his best.

[00:35:53] [SPEAKER_01]: He sure is.

[00:35:54] [SPEAKER_01]: Well on the way to the computer store.

[00:35:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, don't forget on the way.

[00:35:57] [SPEAKER_01]: On the way to the computer store,

[00:35:58] [SPEAKER_01]: they take a shortcut down an alley

[00:36:00] [SPEAKER_01]: and that is when some tickling transpires.

[00:36:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Isn't that right Erin?

[00:36:05] Yeah.

[00:36:06] [SPEAKER_01]: Isn't that right Erin?

[00:36:07] [SPEAKER_00]: Cut to me on that one.

[00:36:09] [SPEAKER_01]: It seems like the thing

[00:36:11] [SPEAKER_01]: that you're most excited to talk about.

[00:36:11] [SPEAKER_00]: It was probably my favorite scene.

[00:36:12] [SPEAKER_00]: They pull into an alley

[00:36:14] [SPEAKER_00]: and there is a group of, I don't know,

[00:36:17] [SPEAKER_00]: half a dozen, eight, 10.

[00:36:19] [SPEAKER_00]: Gang members.

[00:36:19] [SPEAKER_00]: Just grown men graffitiing together

[00:36:22] [SPEAKER_02]: on Christmas Eve night.

[00:36:23] [SPEAKER_02]: As you do.

[00:36:24] [SPEAKER_02]: They typically do it.

[00:36:25] [SPEAKER_02]: Brandon and I do that every year.

[00:36:26] [SPEAKER_02]: But why?

[00:36:27] [SPEAKER_02]: On Christmas.

[00:36:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, we go out and we do.

[00:36:28] [SPEAKER_02]: At Christmas.

[00:36:29] [SPEAKER_00]: And so they're like, this is bad.

[00:36:31] [SPEAKER_00]: Santa's trying to get through the alley

[00:36:33] [SPEAKER_00]: and Santa is so naive.

[00:36:35] [SPEAKER_00]: He doesn't know.

[00:36:37] [SPEAKER_00]: All of a sudden the men surround the car

[00:36:38] [SPEAKER_00]: and they start shaking the car

[00:36:40] [SPEAKER_00]: and then that's when Santa's like,

[00:36:41] [SPEAKER_00]: oh these are naughty boys.

[00:36:43] [SPEAKER_00]: And the kids are like, yeah, no duh.

[00:36:44] [SPEAKER_00]: They're graffitiing in an alley.

[00:36:47] [SPEAKER_00]: So Santa gets out.

[00:36:48] [SPEAKER_00]: One of the guys is like, we're gonna fight

[00:36:50] [SPEAKER_00]: and he's all like, let's go Santa.

[00:36:52] [SPEAKER_00]: And then Santa gets real close

[00:36:54] [SPEAKER_00]: and it's like tickle, tickle, tickle.

[00:36:56] [SPEAKER_02]: No, he says coochie, coochie, coo.

[00:36:57] [SPEAKER_02]: You know that.

[00:36:58] [SPEAKER_02]: You know that.

[00:36:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Try not to let him know that.

[00:36:59] [SPEAKER_02]: We know it from the captions is coochie, coochie, coochie.

[00:37:01] [SPEAKER_00]: At one point he does say tickle, tickle, tickle.

[00:37:02] [SPEAKER_02]: He said, listen.

[00:37:03] [SPEAKER_00]: I read the captions.

[00:37:04] [SPEAKER_00]: He does say tickle, tickle, tickle.

[00:37:07] [SPEAKER_02]: This Santa loves tickling grown adults

[00:37:13] [SPEAKER_02]: without their consent at a level no one should.

[00:37:18] [SPEAKER_02]: It is behaviors that we've gotta talk about.

[00:37:21] [SPEAKER_02]: It's different.

[00:37:22] [SPEAKER_00]: But the gang members really love to do it.

[00:37:24] [SPEAKER_01]: He also like flips at one point,

[00:37:26] [SPEAKER_01]: which I don't feel like we make a big enough deal

[00:37:30] [SPEAKER_01]: about that.

[00:37:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, his magic.

[00:37:32] [SPEAKER_01]: It's all the tickling I think.

[00:37:33] [SPEAKER_00]: But after the tickling, the guy is like,

[00:37:35] [SPEAKER_00]: you know what, you're all right, man.

[00:37:37] [SPEAKER_00]: Where are you trying to be?

[00:37:38] [SPEAKER_00]: You shouldn't be in this part of town.

[00:37:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Let me take you to a knockoff Best Buy.

[00:37:40] [SPEAKER_00]: So he's like, follow me and the boys.

[00:37:43] [SPEAKER_00]: We'll escort you to the Best Buy.

[00:37:45] [SPEAKER_02]: Where they have one of the strongest computers,

[00:37:49] [SPEAKER_02]: the fastest computers, the best computers,

[00:37:50] [SPEAKER_02]: and they have a working one in the Best Buy

[00:37:53] [SPEAKER_02]: that you can plug into and use if you'd like.

[00:37:55] [SPEAKER_02]: It's like a Kinko's Best Buy combo.

[00:37:56] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes, 100%.

[00:37:57] [SPEAKER_01]: You have a bad idea for 2001.

[00:37:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Easy peasy.

[00:38:00] [SPEAKER_01]: So they're in the process of doing that.

[00:38:01] [SPEAKER_01]: While all that's happening,

[00:38:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Danny and Nick now have a little bit of a mission

[00:38:07] [SPEAKER_01]: that they have come up with.

[00:38:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Now, Nick has come to the conclusion,

[00:38:11] [SPEAKER_01]: if we go to fancier houses, I will get nicer things.

[00:38:15] [SPEAKER_01]: So we should go to this super nice place.

[00:38:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Danny's like, why are we going there?

[00:38:19] [SPEAKER_01]: They already got presents.

[00:38:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Let's go to a homeless shelter

[00:38:21] [SPEAKER_01]: and give them a nice.

[00:38:22] [SPEAKER_00]: He thinks that they should go spread some cheer

[00:38:24] [SPEAKER_00]: at a homeless shelter.

[00:38:25] [SPEAKER_01]: That's right.

[00:38:25] [SPEAKER_01]: So Nick has this idea,

[00:38:29] [SPEAKER_01]: hey, what if we swap the meals?

[00:38:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Like we give the homeless shelter

[00:38:33] [SPEAKER_01]: all of the really rich food

[00:38:35] [SPEAKER_01]: and then we give the rich people nothing.

[00:38:38] [SPEAKER_01]: That's how they'll learn.

[00:38:39] [SPEAKER_01]: He doesn't actually want to do that though.

[00:38:41] [SPEAKER_01]: This is all a ruse.

[00:38:44] [SPEAKER_01]: To go get the rich people stuff.

[00:38:44] [SPEAKER_01]: That's exactly right.

[00:38:45] [SPEAKER_01]: And it's working great.

[00:38:48] [SPEAKER_01]: But when Danny comes in to check on the progress

[00:38:51] [SPEAKER_01]: and to be like, hey, I got a tiny little turkey,

[00:38:53] [SPEAKER_01]: blah, blah, blah, he then sees

[00:38:56] [SPEAKER_01]: that Nick has on his finger a ring

[00:38:59] [SPEAKER_01]: and that he has clearly been stealing.

[00:39:02] [SPEAKER_01]: And he presses the big boy button,

[00:39:04] [SPEAKER_01]: which causes all of the stuff that are in his pockets

[00:39:07] [SPEAKER_01]: that he has shrunk down for sale later

[00:39:09] [SPEAKER_01]: to then expand.

[00:39:11] [SPEAKER_02]: I would low ball it at $50 million worth of things.

[00:39:15] [SPEAKER_02]: $50 million worth of things.

[00:39:17] [SPEAKER_02]: He needed 30,000 bucks.

[00:39:20] [SPEAKER_02]: 50 mil.

[00:39:22] [SPEAKER_02]: Well got away.

[00:39:22] [SPEAKER_02]: It's like he tried to make meth for his family

[00:39:25] [SPEAKER_02]: provide when he was dead.

[00:39:27] [SPEAKER_02]: And then it just got away from him.

[00:39:28] [SPEAKER_02]: He got power hungry.

[00:39:30] [SPEAKER_02]: It happens.

[00:39:31] [SPEAKER_02]: And yeah.

[00:39:32] [SPEAKER_02]: When you realize you can-

[00:39:33] [SPEAKER_00]: And while we were watching,

[00:39:34] [SPEAKER_00]: it did sound like Bran had some experience

[00:39:36] [SPEAKER_00]: in this department.

[00:39:37] [SPEAKER_00]: Cause he was like, guys,

[00:39:38] [SPEAKER_00]: it gets away from you sometimes.

[00:39:39] [SPEAKER_01]: It gets away from me.

[00:39:40] [SPEAKER_00]: Cause we were like, yo, Brian Cranston slow down

[00:39:42] [SPEAKER_00]: and Bran was defending him pretty hard.

[00:39:44] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm just saying it gets away from me.

[00:39:46] [SPEAKER_00]: So we're still waiting for that story from Bran

[00:39:47] [SPEAKER_00]: and we'll report back when we get it.

[00:39:49] [SPEAKER_02]: What if, you know what we were talking about?

[00:39:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Three words, cotton eye Joe.

[00:39:51] [SPEAKER_02]: What if we did a bramble jam host casino night?

[00:39:57] [SPEAKER_02]: Like we take everybody that works for us

[00:39:58] [SPEAKER_02]: just to a casino for the evening.

[00:40:00] [SPEAKER_02]: Do a whole dress up bit.

[00:40:02] [SPEAKER_02]: Bran was so in.

[00:40:04] [SPEAKER_02]: What casino?

[00:40:05] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know.

[00:40:06] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm just an idea.

[00:40:07] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't have any, I don't even know.

[00:40:07] [SPEAKER_00]: When you said host casino night,

[00:40:09] [SPEAKER_00]: I envisioned the office.

[00:40:11] [SPEAKER_02]: Office, yeah, different story.

[00:40:13] [SPEAKER_02]: Well, I mean we could-

[00:40:13] [SPEAKER_00]: We were like putting on-

[00:40:14] [SPEAKER_00]: We could do that.

[00:40:15] [SPEAKER_01]: We could do it at Christmas con.

[00:40:17] [SPEAKER_01]: We could do bramble jam casino night.

[00:40:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, as a part of Christmas con.

[00:40:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Ooh.

[00:40:21] [SPEAKER_00]: Night one of bramble fast, can we do a casino?

[00:40:24] [SPEAKER_01]: That's actually not a bad idea.

[00:40:26] [SPEAKER_01]: That's actually not a bad idea.

[00:40:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Write that down.

[00:40:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh my gosh.

[00:40:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Do we just crack it?

[00:40:30] [SPEAKER_01]: Do we just crack all of it?

[00:40:32] [SPEAKER_01]: It's about to be three nights.

[00:40:33] [SPEAKER_01]: It's about, we're running out of things.

[00:40:35] [SPEAKER_00]: No, Thursday night, casino night.

[00:40:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, instead of the-

[00:40:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:40:39] [SPEAKER_01]: That's pretty good.

[00:40:41] [SPEAKER_00]: Any whom.

[00:40:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Take a little of that gambling.

[00:40:46] [SPEAKER_00]: We crack a casino.

[00:40:48] [SPEAKER_00]: We did it.

[00:40:49] [SPEAKER_00]: The point is to not play the games,

[00:40:51] [SPEAKER_00]: it's to run the games.

[00:40:52] [SPEAKER_02]: But then we play it and we lose the money back.

[00:40:55] [SPEAKER_02]: And it's paid for, Brian.

[00:40:57] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, it's paid for.

[00:40:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Cracked it.

[00:40:58] [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, we get it.

[00:40:59] [SPEAKER_01]: We crack casinos.

[00:41:00] [SPEAKER_00]: Thanks for coming to our business meeting.

[00:41:01] [SPEAKER_01]: So the, where were we?

[00:41:04] [SPEAKER_01]: This will be funny for five of you.

[00:41:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, so now Danny is-

[00:41:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Adopted.

[00:41:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Upset and he's basically like,

[00:41:11] [SPEAKER_01]: hey man, kick rocks, I'm done with you,

[00:41:14] [SPEAKER_01]: not just now but forever.

[00:41:15] [SPEAKER_00]: How did he discover that he was stealing?

[00:41:17] [SPEAKER_00]: He did it before we did this.

[00:41:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, we did it?

[00:41:19] [SPEAKER_01]: You were thinking about-

[00:41:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, I was thinking about casinos.

[00:41:21] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, and so-

[00:41:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Sorry, that's on me.

[00:41:24] [SPEAKER_01]: No, no, 100%.

[00:41:25] [SPEAKER_01]: My brain went off onto a different track.

[00:41:28] [SPEAKER_01]: And so he leaves with the sleigh, flies back, blah, blah,

[00:41:34] [SPEAKER_01]: and Nick takes, is able to keep the ball,

[00:41:38] [SPEAKER_01]: shrinks everything back down,

[00:41:40] [SPEAKER_01]: and is like whatever, this is fine,

[00:41:42] [SPEAKER_01]: the kid will forget it.

[00:41:43] [SPEAKER_01]: The kid will get over it.

[00:41:43] [SPEAKER_01]: He goes to the bus stop,

[00:41:45] [SPEAKER_01]: he's trying to make himself feel better,

[00:41:47] [SPEAKER_01]: he's like this kid's not gonna be mad at me forever,

[00:41:49] [SPEAKER_01]: blah, blah, blah.

[00:41:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Marvin Harry right there.

[00:41:50] [SPEAKER_01]: But Marvin Harry, the baddies come by

[00:41:53] [SPEAKER_01]: and as you do, you ask the person at the bus stop,

[00:41:56] [SPEAKER_01]: do you know the directions to a specific house?

[00:42:00] [SPEAKER_01]: And once he realizes that it's them,

[00:42:03] [SPEAKER_01]: he just covers his face and he's like,

[00:42:05] [SPEAKER_01]: blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[00:42:05] [SPEAKER_02]: 2001 was a weird time.

[00:42:07] [SPEAKER_02]: I was talking about this,

[00:42:07] [SPEAKER_02]: my wife and I were on a road trip

[00:42:09] [SPEAKER_02]: and we were talking about what we did for directions

[00:42:11] [SPEAKER_02]: and we printed out MapQuest directions,

[00:42:13] [SPEAKER_02]: that's what we did in 2001.

[00:42:14] [SPEAKER_02]: In fact, they don't have a pack of MapQuest,

[00:42:16] [SPEAKER_02]: just shows maybe this movie's not accurate.

[00:42:18] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know if we're gonna put it out there.

[00:42:19] [SPEAKER_02]: But also, if you didn't have that,

[00:42:21] [SPEAKER_02]: you had to read a map.

[00:42:23] [SPEAKER_00]: I just don't know why anybody would even try that,

[00:42:26] [SPEAKER_01]: that's crazy.

[00:42:27] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't know how, once you get down to the street level,

[00:42:30] [SPEAKER_01]: like highways, I think we could figure it out.

[00:42:32] [SPEAKER_00]: Their driver has one functioning eye at this point

[00:42:34] [SPEAKER_00]: because his contact is-

[00:42:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Which by the way, switch drivers.

[00:42:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Just switch it.

[00:42:38] [SPEAKER_01]: There's two other people in the car

[00:42:40] [SPEAKER_01]: because someone else, he is like,

[00:42:44] [SPEAKER_00]: not a good way to get there in one piece.

[00:42:46] [SPEAKER_01]: But they do.

[00:42:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Santa, also by the way, sorry,

[00:42:50] [SPEAKER_01]: at the computer store, they're actually,

[00:42:52] [SPEAKER_01]: it's about to work, they take control over the sleigh,

[00:42:55] [SPEAKER_01]: but then the store's gonna shut down

[00:42:56] [SPEAKER_01]: so they get kicked out.

[00:42:57] [SPEAKER_00]: Well no, they get control of the sleigh,

[00:42:59] [SPEAKER_00]: they're putting in the coordinates

[00:43:00] [SPEAKER_00]: to bring the sleigh back to the Wrigley's house.

[00:43:05] [SPEAKER_00]: But Danny is like, let's reboot the system.

[00:43:08] [SPEAKER_00]: So he turns the sleigh off,

[00:43:09] [SPEAKER_00]: the sleigh goes into free fall.

[00:43:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh yeah, you would turn it off,

[00:43:11] [SPEAKER_02]: turn it on situation.

[00:43:13] [SPEAKER_02]: Which saves dinner here tonight.

[00:43:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Which kicks the hackers out.

[00:43:14] [SPEAKER_00]: They turn the sleigh back on,

[00:43:16] [SPEAKER_00]: they land at the mansion,

[00:43:17] [SPEAKER_00]: and then the whole bit about Danny

[00:43:19] [SPEAKER_00]: finding out his uncle's a thief.

[00:43:20] [SPEAKER_01]: So they are now at their house.

[00:43:23] [SPEAKER_01]: We're all at the Wrigley's house.

[00:43:24] [SPEAKER_00]: We're now at the Wrigley's house,

[00:43:25] [SPEAKER_00]: the sleigh is broken.

[00:43:27] [SPEAKER_01]: The thieves show up and they're like,

[00:43:31] [SPEAKER_01]: hey, you, and Santa tries to do his tickle trick.

[00:43:33] [SPEAKER_01]: Because he loves to tickle grown people.

[00:43:34] [SPEAKER_01]: But it does not work,

[00:43:35] [SPEAKER_01]: and they're basically,

[00:43:36] [SPEAKER_01]: they are convinced that Nick must be there.

[00:43:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Nick is not there, Nick is behind them.

[00:43:41] [SPEAKER_01]: He walks up, he slams a door, it's awesome.

[00:43:44] [SPEAKER_01]: And he says, hey guys, I got all this stuff

[00:43:48] [SPEAKER_01]: and I was gonna pay you back,

[00:43:49] [SPEAKER_01]: but this isn't my stuff to give.

[00:43:52] [SPEAKER_00]: He learns a lesson.

[00:43:54] [SPEAKER_01]: But he's like, you're not gonna do anything to me,

[00:43:56] [SPEAKER_01]: and you know why?

[00:43:57] [SPEAKER_01]: And then he shrinks, he shrinks the muscle,

[00:44:00] [SPEAKER_01]: and they run away.

[00:44:02] [SPEAKER_02]: Santa promises to go return all the stuff for him.

[00:44:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Nick's back and good with the family.

[00:44:06] [SPEAKER_01]: That's right.

[00:44:06] [SPEAKER_01]: And the movie ends on Christmas morning.

[00:44:08] [SPEAKER_01]: The family opens up all their presents,

[00:44:10] [SPEAKER_01]: and Nick gets a guitar that he always wanted

[00:44:13] [SPEAKER_01]: as a kid that Santa never gave him

[00:44:15] [SPEAKER_01]: because he was a naughty boy.

[00:44:17] [SPEAKER_01]: And Santa says to Nick.

[00:44:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Favorite naughty boy.

[00:44:20] [SPEAKER_01]: That's right, it is his favorite naughty boy.

[00:44:22] [SPEAKER_01]: That's who he likes to tickle more than anybody else.

[00:44:23] [SPEAKER_00]: And then he plugs that into the amp

[00:44:24] [SPEAKER_00]: that Santa also gave him.

[00:44:26] [SPEAKER_00]: He shreds!

[00:44:27] [SPEAKER_00]: He shreds.

[00:44:27] [SPEAKER_02]: He's trying to get to that explicit,

[00:44:29] [SPEAKER_02]: that's all I'm doing.

[00:44:30] [SPEAKER_00]: And that was Twas the Night.

[00:44:31] [SPEAKER_00]: Twas the Night.

[00:44:32] [SPEAKER_02]: Love four, nope, just Twas the Night.

[00:44:34] [SPEAKER_02]: We're gonna take a quick break.

[00:44:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Decon Descendants.

[00:44:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, good enough.

[00:44:39] [SPEAKER_03]: Got my joke?

[00:44:46] [SPEAKER_01]: Welcome back everybody.

[00:44:47] [SPEAKER_00]: So where did he come from?

[00:44:49] [SPEAKER_00]: Where did he go?

[00:44:49] [SPEAKER_01]: My bigger question is where did he go?

[00:44:51] [SPEAKER_01]: We only have two segments left, that's it.

[00:44:53] That's it.

[00:44:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Are you guys ready?

[00:44:56] [SPEAKER_01]: Are ya?

[00:44:57] [SPEAKER_01]: It's time for the overtime segments

[00:44:59] [SPEAKER_01]: where we talk about how this movie

[00:45:00] [SPEAKER_01]: aged over time.

[00:45:00] [SPEAKER_01]: I've got some letterbox reviews if you wanna.

[00:45:02] [SPEAKER_01]: I do.

[00:45:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Silent J says three and a half stars.

[00:45:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Sometimes all you need for Christmas is Walter White

[00:45:08] [SPEAKER_01]: and his pre-Meth days playing Santa

[00:45:10] [SPEAKER_01]: for a night after accidentally knocking out

[00:45:13] [SPEAKER_01]: the real Santa.

[00:45:14] [SPEAKER_01]: That's exactly right Silent J.

[00:45:15] [SPEAKER_01]: That is sometimes what you need.

[00:45:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Lydia says, Jesse, we need to save Christmas!

[00:45:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Lots of Walter White stuff in the end of these reviews

[00:45:23] [SPEAKER_01]: if you can believe it.

[00:45:25] [SPEAKER_01]: I believe it.

[00:45:26] [SPEAKER_01]: You can what?

[00:45:27] [SPEAKER_01]: So they're going to the doctors.

[00:45:30] [SPEAKER_01]: Oz says three and a half stars.

[00:45:31] [SPEAKER_01]: My favorite Christmas movie directed by Michael Myers.

[00:45:36] [SPEAKER_01]: That's great.

[00:45:37] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't really know what to do with that.

[00:45:39] [SPEAKER_00]: It's spooky season.

[00:45:41] [SPEAKER_01]: George says two and a half stars.

[00:45:42] [SPEAKER_01]: This Breaking Bad Christmas special

[00:45:43] [SPEAKER_01]: was surprisingly wholesome.

[00:45:46] Fun.

[00:45:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Jeffrey says, I think I saw this Disney Channel

[00:45:52] [SPEAKER_01]: original movie one time,

[00:45:54] [SPEAKER_01]: but then I remembered nothing about it.

[00:45:56] [SPEAKER_01]: It's very stupid,

[00:45:57] [SPEAKER_01]: but Santa fights people with tickling,

[00:45:59] [SPEAKER_01]: so it's not all bad.

[00:46:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Some might argue that that is what makes it bad.

[00:46:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Who can say, let's share our thoughts

[00:46:04] [SPEAKER_01]: on how this movie aged over time.

[00:46:05] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm gonna start with you, Erin.

[00:46:06] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin, what'd you think about Twas the Night?

[00:46:08] [SPEAKER_01]: A movie that you did not see.

[00:46:09] [SPEAKER_01]: So it hasn't aged over time.

[00:46:10] [SPEAKER_00]: It hasn't aged over time.

[00:46:11] [SPEAKER_00]: We're gonna find out how it's aging right now.

[00:46:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Over the course of the last two hours.

[00:46:14] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[00:46:15] [SPEAKER_00]: I had a lot of fun with this movie.

[00:46:19] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm sad I did not see this movie growing up.

[00:46:22] [SPEAKER_00]: Instead, the only decom Christmas movie I ever had

[00:46:24] [SPEAKER_00]: was The Ultimate Christmas Present,

[00:46:26] [SPEAKER_00]: which I don't love.

[00:46:28] [SPEAKER_00]: So I'm sad for all those Christmases

[00:46:30] [SPEAKER_00]: that young Erin didn't get to watch this movie

[00:46:32] [SPEAKER_00]: and enjoy the high jigs.

[00:46:33] [SPEAKER_02]: Did you love Ultimate Christmas Present as a kid?

[00:46:35] [SPEAKER_02]: I forgot.

[00:46:35] [SPEAKER_00]: No.

[00:46:35] [SPEAKER_02]: You didn't, okay.

[00:46:36] [SPEAKER_00]: No, it stressed me out.

[00:46:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, that's right.

[00:46:38] [SPEAKER_02]: That's right, that's right.

[00:46:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, yeah, cool, cool, cool, cool.

[00:46:42] [SPEAKER_00]: And so this one, I feel like,

[00:46:44] [SPEAKER_00]: I mean it felt a lot shorter

[00:46:46] [SPEAKER_00]: than Ultimate Christmas Present.

[00:46:47] [SPEAKER_00]: Ultimate Christmas Present, it blizzards for days

[00:46:50] [SPEAKER_00]: and everyone dies.

[00:46:51] [SPEAKER_00]: It blizzards for days.

[00:46:51] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, we're just killing folks.

[00:46:53] [SPEAKER_00]: But this one, it's one night, we get in.

[00:46:55] [SPEAKER_00]: We have a ton of high jigs.

[00:46:58] [SPEAKER_00]: The tech in 2024, not great.

[00:47:03] [SPEAKER_00]: But in 2001, 11-year-old me

[00:47:06] [SPEAKER_00]: would have been pumped to see this tech.

[00:47:10] [SPEAKER_00]: So yeah, I had a great time.

[00:47:12] [SPEAKER_00]: This movie was a lot of fun.

[00:47:13] [SPEAKER_00]: I will probably watch this movie again

[00:47:15] [SPEAKER_00]: at Christmastime.

[00:47:16] [SPEAKER_00]: Big fan.

[00:47:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Big fan.

[00:47:18] [SPEAKER_01]: I had also never seen this movie.

[00:47:20] [SPEAKER_01]: I discovered it last year as I,

[00:47:23] [SPEAKER_01]: I watched The Naughty Nine with my children,

[00:47:26] [SPEAKER_01]: which is the Christmas movie.

[00:47:28] [SPEAKER_01]: Not a Disney Channel original movie,

[00:47:29] [SPEAKER_01]: a Disney original or whatever it's called now.

[00:47:32] [SPEAKER_01]: A doll.

[00:47:33] [SPEAKER_01]: Watched that and then this came up

[00:47:35] [SPEAKER_01]: underneath the whatever and I was like,

[00:47:36] [SPEAKER_01]: that's Bryan Cranston.

[00:47:37] [SPEAKER_01]: And then I discovered that it was a DCOM.

[00:47:40] [SPEAKER_01]: And I liked it then.

[00:47:42] [SPEAKER_01]: I watched it with my kids though,

[00:47:44] [SPEAKER_01]: and I think they were a little bit young.

[00:47:46] [SPEAKER_01]: They didn't care as much.

[00:47:47] [SPEAKER_01]: They were a little bit on the younger side

[00:47:49] [SPEAKER_01]: for this movie,

[00:47:50] [SPEAKER_01]: which I can't say is the case for all DCOMs.

[00:47:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Some DCOMs I think play better

[00:47:55] [SPEAKER_01]: for younger kids than this movie does.

[00:47:57] [SPEAKER_01]: This movie is an interesting one

[00:47:59] [SPEAKER_01]: because it doesn't quite feel like a DCOM.

[00:48:04] [SPEAKER_01]: There's elements of it that I think are

[00:48:09] [SPEAKER_01]: better than a DCOM.

[00:48:11] [SPEAKER_01]: And there's elements that I think are,

[00:48:13] [SPEAKER_01]: they just don't quite fit into all the little tropes.

[00:48:16] [SPEAKER_02]: It feels like a movie of the week a little bit

[00:48:18] [SPEAKER_02]: instead of a DCOM.

[00:48:19] [SPEAKER_02]: DCOM has its own thing,

[00:48:20] [SPEAKER_02]: but this is movie of the week beats for sure.

[00:48:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Obviously Bryan Cranston was wonderful

[00:48:26] [SPEAKER_01]: and was great to see him in this role.

[00:48:29] [SPEAKER_01]: This is an interesting one.

[00:48:31] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm still trying to figure out where I'm gonna put it,

[00:48:34] [SPEAKER_01]: but if I'm just comparing it

[00:48:36] [SPEAKER_01]: to the other Christmas movie,

[00:48:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Ultimate Christmas Present,

[00:48:39] [SPEAKER_01]: I did really like Ultimate Christmas Present as a kid.

[00:48:42] [SPEAKER_01]: And I think I still like this one a little bit more

[00:48:45] [SPEAKER_01]: though than Ultimate Christmas Present,

[00:48:47] [SPEAKER_01]: but I think it's close.

[00:48:47] [SPEAKER_01]: It's close in my mind.

[00:48:48] [SPEAKER_01]: Dano?

[00:48:49] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, this movie definitely has some fun.

[00:48:51] [SPEAKER_02]: I mean, it just has some.

[00:48:53] [SPEAKER_02]: If you're gonna watch this movie of DCOMs,

[00:48:56] [SPEAKER_02]: there's gonna be some moments

[00:48:57] [SPEAKER_02]: where you're gonna be like,

[00:48:57] [SPEAKER_02]: Bryan Cranston is a delight when he's on screen

[00:49:00] [SPEAKER_02]: and the idea of the movie is also fun.

[00:49:03] [SPEAKER_02]: Does it always work for me?

[00:49:05] [SPEAKER_02]: No, not really.

[00:49:07] [SPEAKER_02]: I think this is the worst Santa I've seen on screen

[00:49:10] [SPEAKER_02]: and that took away.

[00:49:11] [SPEAKER_02]: I wish the Santa was more fun in on the joke fun.

[00:49:15] [SPEAKER_02]: He's so aloof and dumb and stupid about stuff

[00:49:18] [SPEAKER_02]: and it's played for last.

[00:49:20] [SPEAKER_02]: I think a better actor.

[00:49:21] [SPEAKER_01]: I almost wish it was the Santa

[00:49:23] [SPEAKER_01]: from Ultimate Christmas Present.

[00:49:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh my gosh, he'd have crushed it.

[00:49:26] [SPEAKER_01]: That guy would have been unbelievable.

[00:49:27] [SPEAKER_01]: He's super serious.

[00:49:30] [SPEAKER_01]: Santa was so dumb.

[00:49:32] [SPEAKER_00]: Well, at times I felt like it was a really big problem

[00:49:35] [SPEAKER_00]: and then at other times I was like, he has no clue.

[00:49:37] [SPEAKER_00]: There's no clue.

[00:49:38] [SPEAKER_00]: At one point he was just like,

[00:49:39] [SPEAKER_00]: well, I'm just gonna give up on Christmas.

[00:49:40] [SPEAKER_02]: If you lean into that,

[00:49:41] [SPEAKER_02]: if you have the Santa be just not bright and dumb

[00:49:45] [SPEAKER_02]: and not know what anything is

[00:49:47] [SPEAKER_02]: and really lean in for comedic effect,

[00:49:49] [SPEAKER_02]: I think it works.

[00:49:50] [SPEAKER_02]: This Santa, they tried to play it both ways

[00:49:52] [SPEAKER_02]: and that was kind of a downer.

[00:49:54] [SPEAKER_02]: Sadly enough, any scene without Santa in it,

[00:49:58] [SPEAKER_02]: I really dug it.

[00:49:59] [SPEAKER_02]: The scenes with Santa in it kind of took me out of it

[00:50:02] [SPEAKER_02]: but Bryan Cranston is a national treasure

[00:50:04] [SPEAKER_02]: and he's really, really fun in this.

[00:50:06] [SPEAKER_02]: I just feel like anytime I watch him,

[00:50:08] [SPEAKER_02]: he's never not giving 100, 1000%.

[00:50:11] [SPEAKER_02]: The thing they say about Nick Cage

[00:50:12] [SPEAKER_02]: about how he always has given the full cage,

[00:50:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Bryan Cranston is always giving everything he's got

[00:50:18] [SPEAKER_02]: and so he's going great in this movie.

[00:50:20] [SPEAKER_00]: The best part about Santa was his cape.

[00:50:22] [SPEAKER_02]: Well, yeah, you couldn't get over the cape.

[00:50:24] [SPEAKER_01]: Let's make our list, let's check it twice.

[00:50:27] [SPEAKER_01]: What did we think about this movie in regards,

[00:50:30] [SPEAKER_01]: in relation, sorry, to all of the other D-coms

[00:50:32] [SPEAKER_01]: that we've seen?

[00:50:34] [SPEAKER_01]: Erin, where are you putting this one?

[00:50:38] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I like my list

[00:50:40] [SPEAKER_00]: but my list is gonna make Bryan sad.

[00:50:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, here we go.

[00:50:44] [SPEAKER_02]: RIP obviously, buh-buh-break is buh-buh-bye.

[00:50:50] [SPEAKER_00]: This movie is gonna air at number nine.

[00:50:53] [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.

[00:50:53] [SPEAKER_00]: Premier at number nine.

[00:50:54] [SPEAKER_00]: It's gonna air at nine.

[00:50:55] [SPEAKER_03]: It's gonna air at number nine right after the break.

[00:50:57] It's gonna air at nine.

[00:51:00] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I just had a lot of fun with this.

[00:51:02] [SPEAKER_00]: I think this is gonna be how I watch

[00:51:04] [SPEAKER_00]: Phantom of the Megaplex every Halloween,

[00:51:06] [SPEAKER_00]: Halloween time every Halloween.

[00:51:08] [SPEAKER_00]: This is gonna become on a regular rotation

[00:51:10] [SPEAKER_00]: of Christmas movies that I watch.

[00:51:13] [SPEAKER_00]: So yeah, we have 10 Quints, nine Toll's of the Night,

[00:51:16] [SPEAKER_00]: eight Phantom of the Megaplex, seven Xenon,

[00:51:20] [SPEAKER_00]: six Halloween Town, five The Luck of the Irish,

[00:51:23] [SPEAKER_00]: four Smart House, three Miracle in Lane Two,

[00:51:27] [SPEAKER_00]: two Johnny's Tsunami and one Motocross.

[00:51:30] [SPEAKER_01]: Motocross.

[00:51:32] [SPEAKER_01]: No Brink.

[00:51:32] [SPEAKER_01]: So that means Brink's gone.

[00:51:34] [SPEAKER_01]: Brink is gone, so that's the one that got kicked out.

[00:51:36] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, Brink is now 11.

[00:51:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Brink, RIP obviously.

[00:51:39] [SPEAKER_01]: Brink's just gone.

[00:51:40] [SPEAKER_02]: That's right, and Brink's clearly gonna move out.

[00:51:42] [SPEAKER_00]: I thought about it, I thought about it.

[00:51:43] [SPEAKER_00]: It's still a great nostalgic DCOM, but yeah.

[00:51:48] [SPEAKER_02]: Doesn't hold up to some of the performances

[00:51:50] [SPEAKER_02]: and some of the stuff that they try.

[00:51:51] [SPEAKER_02]: Like the DCOM universe is so much bigger

[00:51:54] [SPEAKER_02]: and bolder than Brink.

[00:51:56] [SPEAKER_02]: It just is.

[00:51:58] [SPEAKER_02]: That's the best way to describe it.

[00:51:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Brink does what it does perfectly.

[00:52:00] [SPEAKER_00]: I did Thoughts and Prayers obviously,

[00:52:04] [SPEAKER_00]: but that's where we are.

[00:52:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, this movie is a tough ranking for me.

[00:52:09] [SPEAKER_01]: It feels more like a...

[00:52:12] [SPEAKER_02]: If this Christmas movie is not in Brink's top 10.

[00:52:14] [SPEAKER_02]: It's not in my top 10.

[00:52:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Unbelievable.

[00:52:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh my gosh.

[00:52:17] [SPEAKER_01]: It feels more like a wonderful world of Disney movie

[00:52:20] [SPEAKER_01]: than it does a DCOM,

[00:52:22] [SPEAKER_01]: and I have it premiering at number 12.

[00:52:24] [SPEAKER_02]: I love the hoops you jump through to rank your movies.

[00:52:27] [SPEAKER_02]: It's just different every week.

[00:52:29] [SPEAKER_02]: There is no bullseye.

[00:52:30] [SPEAKER_02]: It's just bullseyes everywhere.

[00:52:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Number 12 for me.

[00:52:33] [SPEAKER_00]: I can't believe Grown Men Tickle Fight

[00:52:34] [SPEAKER_00]: isn't in your top 10.

[00:52:35] [SPEAKER_01]: I know, it's just behind Quince

[00:52:38] [SPEAKER_01]: and just in front of Alley Cat Strike.

[00:52:42] [SPEAKER_01]: So my top 10 is the same.

[00:52:44] [SPEAKER_01]: Halloween Town, Miracle Lane 2, Jet Jackson,

[00:52:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Phantom of the Megablast.

[00:52:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Starz and Jackson.

[00:52:51] [SPEAKER_01]: Mom's got a date.

[00:52:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Luck of the Irish.

[00:52:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Number four is Smart House.

[00:52:54] [SPEAKER_01]: Smart House.

[00:52:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Three, Motocross.

[00:52:56] [SPEAKER_01]: Two, Johnny Tsunami.

[00:52:58] [SPEAKER_01]: And number one, the greatest movie of all time,

[00:53:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Brink.

[00:53:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Twas the Night debuts at 10 for me.

[00:53:08] [SPEAKER_02]: At 10 for me.

[00:53:10] [SPEAKER_02]: And it kicks out Luck of the Irish.

[00:53:14] [SPEAKER_02]: I think this is a better movie across the board.

[00:53:18] [SPEAKER_02]: Luck of the Irish is terrible, but it's silly.

[00:53:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Well you had to have one leprechaun movie in there

[00:53:22] [SPEAKER_00]: and Twas the Night did have some leprechaun

[00:53:24] [SPEAKER_00]: adjacent hijinks.

[00:53:26] [SPEAKER_02]: So Luck of the Irish makes its way out.

[00:53:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Twas the Night makes its way in.

[00:53:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Number nine, Smart House.

[00:53:31] [SPEAKER_02]: Number eight, Brink.

[00:53:33] [SPEAKER_02]: Number seven, Quince.

[00:53:35] [SPEAKER_02]: Six, Miracle Lane 2.

[00:53:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Number five, Phantom of the Megaplex.

[00:53:38] [SPEAKER_02]: Staying still this week.

[00:53:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Not moving up any further.

[00:53:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Number four, Halloween Town.

[00:53:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Number three, Mom's Got a Date with a Vampire.

[00:53:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Number two, Johnny Tsunami.

[00:53:46] [SPEAKER_02]: And number one, the best decom by far, Motocrossed.

[00:53:51] [SPEAKER_00]: Can you imagine if this movie had also had

[00:53:53] [SPEAKER_00]: just a quick little scene?

[00:53:56] [SPEAKER_02]: With Sinbad?

[00:53:56] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, every movie.

[00:53:57] [SPEAKER_02]: You get it.

[00:53:58] [SPEAKER_00]: No, but like when Bryan Cranston shrinks down,

[00:54:01] [SPEAKER_00]: with Luck of the Irish they had the big seatbelt

[00:54:04] [SPEAKER_00]: and the car keys.

[00:54:05] [SPEAKER_00]: There would have been one thing where he's holding

[00:54:07] [SPEAKER_00]: an ornament or something.

[00:54:08] [SPEAKER_00]: Where is that at?

[00:54:09] [SPEAKER_00]: That would have been...

[00:54:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Instead we get more of creepy Santa.

[00:54:13] [SPEAKER_02]: The Santa thing's making me almost take it out

[00:54:15] [SPEAKER_02]: of my top 10.

[00:54:15] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't think he was that creepy,

[00:54:16] [SPEAKER_00]: I thought it was funny.

[00:54:17] [SPEAKER_02]: All right, cool.

[00:54:18] [SPEAKER_01]: I think the Santa was the deciding factor for me.

[00:54:21] [SPEAKER_01]: It just didn't fit with all of them.

[00:54:23] [SPEAKER_02]: But the way you reacted at the end of this movie

[00:54:25] [SPEAKER_02]: was like something in between all your dreams

[00:54:28] [SPEAKER_02]: had come true and we need to give him some alone time.

[00:54:30] [SPEAKER_01]: Listen, there's definitely a chance that next week...

[00:54:32] [SPEAKER_00]: In their opening presents.

[00:54:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, he was in his own world.

[00:54:35] [SPEAKER_00]: Dan and I had to leave the room.

[00:54:37] [SPEAKER_00]: Listen, there's a chance...

[00:54:38] [SPEAKER_01]: HR violations left and right over here.

[00:54:40] [SPEAKER_01]: There's a chance we come in next week

[00:54:41] [SPEAKER_01]: and this has moved up big, bigly.

[00:54:43] [SPEAKER_01]: It was just a really hard one for me to rank.

[00:54:46] [SPEAKER_00]: I think maybe Christmas does probably mean,

[00:54:48] [SPEAKER_00]: like Christmas movies mean a little bit more

[00:54:50] [SPEAKER_00]: to you in a nostalgic way.

[00:54:51] [SPEAKER_00]: I just thought Santa was hilarious

[00:54:53] [SPEAKER_00]: and I get that he was,

[00:54:54] [SPEAKER_00]: if I'm going for like the Santa Claus,

[00:54:58] [SPEAKER_00]: like no, he's not...

[00:54:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Did you not feel like this movie

[00:55:00] [SPEAKER_01]: didn't quite feel DCOM?

[00:55:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Here's the thing.

[00:55:04] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't know, there were just so many hijinks.

[00:55:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Don't let him talk.

[00:55:06] [SPEAKER_02]: Brandon's also Christmas spirit.

[00:55:06] [SPEAKER_02]: No, no, no, I'm just asking.

[00:55:07] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm just asking.

[00:55:08] [SPEAKER_02]: That's why he ranked the Christmas movie

[00:55:09] [SPEAKER_02]: the lowest of the three of us

[00:55:10] [SPEAKER_02]: is he doesn't have any more Christmas spirit.

[00:55:12] [SPEAKER_02]: It's hard for him to get in the spirit.

[00:55:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Especially in September.

[00:55:14] [SPEAKER_00]: I think the DCOMs that I remember from growing up

[00:55:17] [SPEAKER_00]: definitely had like that DCOM feel.

[00:55:19] [SPEAKER_00]: But then there are a handful

[00:55:20] [SPEAKER_00]: that like don't look under the bed or can of worms.

[00:55:23] [SPEAKER_00]: Like those don't quite feel like a DCOM to me either.

[00:55:26] [SPEAKER_00]: And so that's not really a part of my ranking.

[00:55:30] [SPEAKER_00]: I just could not believe

[00:55:32] [SPEAKER_00]: that there was a script out there

[00:55:33] [SPEAKER_00]: where we had a grown Santa tickling other grown men.

[00:55:38] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and he's got a favorite naughty boy.

[00:55:40] [SPEAKER_00]: And not in a joke like he was seeing...

[00:55:43] [SPEAKER_00]: I just thought it was a funny thing.

[00:55:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Brutal.

[00:55:45] [SPEAKER_02]: No, I hated it.

[00:55:46] [SPEAKER_00]: No, I mean, if someone came up to me

[00:55:48] [SPEAKER_00]: and was like, I'm gonna tickle you,

[00:55:50] [SPEAKER_00]: do not touch me ever.

[00:55:51] [SPEAKER_04]: That's right.

[00:55:51] [SPEAKER_00]: I never want to be tickled by anyone ever.

[00:55:55] [SPEAKER_00]: But it was, I just, I was like,

[00:55:57] [SPEAKER_00]: it was more like I can't believe we're here.

[00:56:00] [SPEAKER_00]: Like this is a thing that we're watching and it's real.

[00:56:04] [SPEAKER_00]: We didn't have the mimosas till after we watched it.

[00:56:07] [SPEAKER_01]: No, that was true, totally sober.

[00:56:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Guys, we are heading into an era of movies

[00:56:12] [SPEAKER_01]: that I'm very excited about,

[00:56:13] [SPEAKER_01]: including next week's movie.

[00:56:16] [SPEAKER_01]: No, we really are heading into an era.

[00:56:17] [SPEAKER_01]: This is the real, this is the real real here.

[00:56:20] [SPEAKER_01]: This is it, this is the stuff.

[00:56:21] [SPEAKER_01]: It felt like there was an era

[00:56:22] [SPEAKER_01]: and then there's been a couple like, you know,

[00:56:24] [SPEAKER_01]: movies that didn't quite stick out.

[00:56:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes, we're heading into an era.

[00:56:30] [SPEAKER_01]: The Cadet Kellys of the world, Get a Clue.

[00:56:34] [SPEAKER_01]: All sorts of great movies.

[00:56:36] [SPEAKER_01]: But next week is a movie that I am most,

[00:56:41] [SPEAKER_01]: I think of the movies we've seen so far,

[00:56:43] [SPEAKER_01]: the movie I'm most excited to watch with Dan,

[00:56:45] [SPEAKER_01]: it's double teamed next week.

[00:56:47] [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, is that next week?

[00:56:48] [SPEAKER_00]: We're here?

[00:56:49] [SPEAKER_01]: We're here, we're family.

[00:56:50] [SPEAKER_01]: We're here everybody.

[00:56:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Like.

[00:56:52] [SPEAKER_01]: I am excited.

[00:56:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Rate, review, subscribe.

[00:56:54] [SPEAKER_01]: Do all those things,

[00:56:55] [SPEAKER_01]: share it with your friends and your family

[00:56:57] [SPEAKER_01]: and everybody you know, even your enemies.

[00:57:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Just send it to somebody.

[00:57:01] [SPEAKER_01]: It could be an olive branch.

[00:57:03] [SPEAKER_01]: And we'll be back next week with another one.

[00:57:05] [SPEAKER_03]: Until then, keep coming.

[00:57:11] [SPEAKER_02]: DCOM Descendants is a Bramble Jam podcast produced

[00:57:14] [SPEAKER_02]: in yeah that green building at the Bramble Jam podcast.

[00:57:16] [SPEAKER_02]: Network Studios is produced by Brain and Gray

[00:57:18] [SPEAKER_02]: and co-produced by Cotton Eye Joe.

[00:57:21] [SPEAKER_02]: To find more information on the socials

[00:57:23] [SPEAKER_02]: go to at DCOM Descendants on the web,

[00:57:27] [SPEAKER_02]: dcompodcast.com.

[00:57:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Watch us watch these movies live.

[00:57:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Go to bramblejamplus.com.

[00:57:32] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did he come from?

[00:57:33] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did he go?

[00:57:35] [SPEAKER_02]: Where did he come from?

[00:57:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Cotton Eye Joe.

[00:57:44] [SPEAKER_01]: You're about to hear some ads

[00:57:46] [SPEAKER_01]: that help keep the lights on here in the old studio.

[00:57:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Thanks for listening or don't listen.

[00:57:53] [SPEAKER_01]: It's really up to you at this point.

[00:57:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Is that the end of the show?

[00:57:56] [SPEAKER_01]: I mean, you're listening to me, hi.

[00:57:59] [SPEAKER_01]: But here they come.

[00:58:00] [SPEAKER_01]: I promised they're coming.

[00:58:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Yep, here they are.

[00:58:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Happy day.